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This is a question Near Death Experiences II

Freddie Woo says: I was once caught right in the middle of in an early morning high-speed 30-car pile-up on the M3, but emerged from the chaos in the only car not to have suffered a dent. My trousers told a different story, and learned that you *do* empty your bowels as Death's icy grip reaches out for you. Tell us about your audition for the Final Destination films.

Suggested by Just a Vagabond

(, Thu 15 May 2014, 12:55)
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Bike crash
Dark night.
Rain.
On a bike path going home.
Sudden glare of a 125cc scooter going the wrong way and on a path that is verboden to him.
He does not even try to do anything to avoid the impact.
I turn, braking is futile, but only manage to partially avoid him.

I go "through" the front of scooter but my leg catches the steering column.
Breaking it.

I bounce off, over a curb into the path a Range that stops inches from me.

My bike is flung about 20m for the impact... Twisted and the fork broken. The two wheels bent like sick pretzels.

Cue to the insurance not wishing to prosecute the case on my behalf.

Still angry.
(, Thu 15 May 2014, 20:24, 13 replies)
'Verboden'? Is you a Dutchie or sumint?

(, Thu 15 May 2014, 20:37, closed)
French
Partially educated in Blighty and Spain.
Now living in Gent.
Studying in Antwerp.

Why?
(, Thu 15 May 2014, 20:51, closed)
Normally us Englanders would say 'verboten' like wot Shakespeare wrights it.
So it struck me that you wrote it with a 'd'.

That's all.

(And the immortal bard would also write "Ghent" like what is proper)
(, Thu 15 May 2014, 21:04, closed)
That's what stops invaders...
The finer points of your idiom.
(, Fri 16 May 2014, 15:47, closed)
you don't need an insurance company to seek damages for a civil wrong
you need a lawyer, son
(, Fri 16 May 2014, 7:32, closed)
Yeah
But by the time the insurance had told me to go it alone, it was a bit late... Plus I needed to fork money out that was supposed to be covered in my premium yadada.
This being France, things got messy and complicated from that point on.
I had the choice of getting on with my life or dedicating 4 to 6 months full time to getting it solved.
That's why I had this insurance, I was covered for this, they should have done everything.

Now that I live in Belgium, stuff like this just get sorted without the aggravation.
I'm French, and France pisses me off.

I they'd told me from the get-go, I would have not sent them anything and called a lawyer presto.

Bastards.
(, Fri 16 May 2014, 15:38, closed)
ça va, Albert?

(, Fri 16 May 2014, 16:06, closed)
Albert?
Is that a reference to the newish king? The one whose father abdicated before reaching senility?

How's Charles?
(, Fri 16 May 2014, 18:55, closed)
chamallow
T pa trop francophone pour un grenouille.
(, Fri 16 May 2014, 21:45, closed)
Une
grenouille.
(, Sun 18 May 2014, 3:26, closed)
oué mais c1 mec

(, Sun 18 May 2014, 9:48, closed)
And how did you guess that
Sunshine?
(, Sun 18 May 2014, 13:45, closed)
mdr ¯\(°_o)/¯ nsp, albert

(, Sun 18 May 2014, 14:11, closed)

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