My downstair's neighbour is ace.
In the few years he's been here he's managed so much.

Called the fire brigade out, cos someone had lit a joss stick in the corridor, in a holder. The same week that the guy drove a range Rover into Glasgow Airport, with gas bombs. As you can imagine, the emergency services were on pretty high alert that week. 2 wagons turned out, with the big ladder, (12 storey block.)
Called them out again, for my right hand neighbour, who was having a barbie on his balcony.
Called the police out to have same neighbour's gf arrested for assault. She'd slapped right hand neighbour's face in our car park, in the midst of one of their many rows. She spent the night in the nick. She's 18 ffs.
He constantly removes his door, and the Lease peeps just put him a new one on, no questions asked.
Caused 4 grands worth of damage to an exterior builder's lift,those cradle things. They'd knocked his Sky dish, so he tied the power cable to the ground, and at about 20 feet it snapped and they were stranded for a few hours. Nearly got fucking electrocuted.
Police and ambulance round on a regular basis, for his pretend suicide attempts.
Threatens to rape people if they make complaints.
His defence is "I'm a gay disabled man"; he's slightly epileptic. Mongs, don't you love them?
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 1 Oct 2009, 14:55, 5 replies)

I can imagine the FB incident reports:
"False Alarm with Stupid Intent"
( The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Thu 1 Oct 2009, 16:41, closed)

Is that a real report they can give then?

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 1 Oct 2009, 16:55, closed)

Not really.
I understand they'd have had to choose between the real options of "False Alarm with Good Intent" or "False Alarm with Malicious Intent" - since in both cases, there was probably* no danger to life or property. Now, while I don't know the full details; their decision would depend on the circumstances of the call. Neither existing option really fits the bill - they don't really want to encourage a pisstake caller by implying that it was sensible to call out and occupy three appliances for a joss stick, or a presumably similar turnout for a barbeque*; but they also don't want to be non-PC and imply that a clearly disturbed, self-identified minority, is a nuisance.

* I'm presuming the Joss stick wasn't sitting on a pile of combustibles, and the barbeque was attended at all time whilst lit, or else he'd have been technically correct - and that's the best kind of correct. But given the rest of his actions, I'm inclined to assume he was a bit of a petty idiot.
( The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Thu 1 Oct 2009, 19:12, closed)

The joss stick was in one of those hippy looking brass holders, on a stone floor.
The barbecue had several people there.
He's not petty, he's just a twat.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 1 Oct 2009, 21:45, closed)

Ah, I see.
Then he's a definite, pure-blood, arsehole.
( The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Thu 1 Oct 2009, 22:16, closed)