The El Don!
A friend of mine is perfect take home to meet your Mother material. He's fantastically good looking, very well mannered and very well spoken.

Unfortunately he's an epic lush who gets out of control when drunk. He likes to jump into bushes and couldn't remember how he fractured his foot! Sober he'd never do this, it would ruin his suit!

There are minor stories like the time a lad wanted to fight him and he told him "look you might beat me up, but I fucked your Mum!" and then told the first lads very angry friend that "It's not my fault his Mum wanted to fuck me"

Or when a midget tried to mug him and he was literally bent over laughing at him until the midget ran away in shame.

Or when two women informed him that the two seats next to them were taken so he shouted at the top of his voice

"LESBIANS"

But no my favourite El Don story is when he was again trollied but this time I wasn't there to egg him on, oh no he had sensible people there to "look after him"

He was getting more and more drunk and his dancing became more and more erratic. So they sat him down and gave him a glass and a jug of water to sober him up. Quite a good idea, unfortunately they got up to dance and left him on his own.

Two minutes later there is a commotion on the dance floor and a huge circle forming around someone. One of the girls goes to look and sees the El Don in the middle dancing, with the jug in his hand soaking everyone in a ten foot radius!

It's a good job he's not a member to return the favour!
(Dangerous Disco Trev Isn't my real name, Thu 9 Apr 2009, 0:44, 2 replies)

He..
..sounds like a prick
(Monkey the Chicken Twitter: death_stairs, Thu 9 Apr 2009, 16:30, closed)

My mum
agrees
(LickOutTheJamsMotherfuckers!, Sun 12 Apr 2009, 16:34, closed)