Not Losing Your VirginityThink back, way back, to when you were a spotty virgin.* It was all a bit overwhelming, wasn't it? I remember going to see a band as a teenager and standing behind a girl who I kinda liked, but who had been showing a lot of interest in a friend for the past week. She reached back and squeezed my leg.
I panicked. Brain decided that she'd clearly made a mistake and thought I was my friend: "Er, you've got the wrong bloke"
It was hours before I worked out what was going on.
So, tell us the stories of when you failed to lose your virginity - whether through your own ineptitude or simply because they scared the bejesus out of you.
* Apologies to spotty virgins out there. Wash.
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chthonic, Fri 27 Oct 2006, 12:13)
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Turn the lights offA bunch of us chaps (virgins all) were invited to a smallish party by a bunch of older girls in Glasgow. Tensions were high and for some extremely strange reason, we all assumed that this was the night when we’d all lose our respective cherries in appropriate corners of the flat. We were all so confident of this, that we’d all (quite separately) bought packets of 3 en route.
I’d previously met one of the girls at a drunken night out the previous week but when I saw her again in the pub sober, I actually screamed. She wasn’t ugly you understand, just a fair bit older and a tad over-emulsioned.
I should add, that I had luckily spent most of my youth avoiding all the usual acne ridden issues, however nature played its joker the previous week by placing biblical proportioned plukes and scabs on my face. I think it was God’s way of saying “she’s really ugly, don’t bother”.
How could she resist ? Very easily as it transpired. She made it perfectly clear I was borderline Living Dead, mate 1’s girl split her trousers and had to go home (I think it may have even been deliberate), mate 3’s girl was violently ill in the toilet (Mmmmmmm vomit) and mate 4’s girl turned out to be mate 3’s girl’s mother.
Laughed ? I nearly slept in the living room with my 3 mates with a pocket full of condoms. Oh I did – damn.
(, Fri 27 Oct 2006, 16:54, Reply)
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