I don't know what they are called but....
they grow in my mum's garden, they look like giant feather dusters and grow to over 6ft tall. Anyway she uses them as a decoration in the house, always has since I was a child. My parents also smoke and would always leave their cigs upstairs for some reason. Being the youngest I always got sent to go and collect them by following their cryptic clues as to their last known location.

This one evening my dad sent me to collect his lighter and fags from his bedside cabinet. He had bought a new lighter, it was one of those fancy ones you press down and it would open up and spark. It didn't work very well. I was walking across the landing and down the stairs to my dad, flicking away at the lighter, trying to get it to spark when I heard a loud fizzing and a slight *whoosh*.

As I turned around these plants had caught light and were literally going up in flames from s stray spark. At the age of 12 I jumped into action, I pulled them away form the curtains, and into the bathroom, straight in the shower and switched it on. Fire out, not even smoke damage....disaster averted.

I then dutifully went downstairs and informed my parents of the event, thinking for certain they would be pleased with my actions.

They were not.

To this day, almost 20 years on, they are convinced I did it on purpose and it was the reason they hired a babysitter until I was 17.

Cunts.
( Bamboo Steamer, Mon 13 Dec 2010, 17:05, 5 replies)

it's called pampas grass

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 13 Dec 2010, 18:19, closed)

Maybe they shouldn't have been so lazy
and gone and go their own fags!
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 13 Dec 2010, 18:23, closed)

Well...
WE know you were a heroic 12 year old.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 2:54, closed)

Did the same
Except in my instance it was semi-intentional.
Being a junior arsonist I was playing with my mum's lighter, gently burning the ends of the dried plant display on top of the mantlepiece when I strayed to close to some of the stuff you mention and WHHOOOSSSHHH! 6 FOOT FLAMES LICKING CEILING OMFG I'MGONNADIEPANICSTATIONS.
I managed to knock the vase onto the carpet (nice one doofus!) where it luckily went out almost as quickly as it went up.
My parents were greeted by the sight of a scorch mark in the carpet and me tearful and apologetic enough to avoid the beating I so rightly deserved
(lopezthecatkiller has not killed a cat since....., Tue 14 Dec 2010, 11:06, closed)

We used to nick them from a neighbour's garden and throw them like spears.
Never thought to light one first though...
(brutal stack Raided the beeves of Apollo on, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 13:34, closed)