I know.
Rationally, I do know.

But it's just so tacky, so crass.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:16, 1 reply, 14 years ago)

Very tacky.
Back about 5 years ago or so, our head of department died. It was weird, we came in to work (he died mid-week) and our Director was there. You could tell he'd been crying.

He told us all that our boss had died the previous night, straight out of the blue.

One of the teams thought it would be a good idea to do a collectively-signed With Sympathy card. You know, twenty-odd scrawled messages to his widow.

I found that tacky to an offensive degree, and refused to sign it.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:19, Reply)

Actually, I'd have probably signed that.
It's someone a) you knew, and b) who had actually died.

My point at the moment is that 30,000 people have just done a bastardisation of a mark of respect for the dead for someone that isn't actually dead.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:22, Reply)

I made a donation to the British Heart Foundation, and donated to the flowers that we sent to his funeral.
He'd just had his redundancy confirmed. I expect his wife may have laid some of the blame for her husband's heart attack and death in his early forties at the door of his employer.

And yeah, the Muamba minute's applause thing is weird.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:24, Reply)

That does all make sense,
just in that situation I wouldn't have had any objection to putting my name to his card.

But it does seem we are pretty much on the same page apart from that.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:26, Reply)

Meh. Whatever you deem to be tasteful I suppose.
Obviously as a department we should show our respects, but I would have preferred a card on behalf of the department, signed by our director and accompanied by flowers, to be the most tasteful option.

I'm no doctor, I don't know if his death was in any way linked to his redundancy and associated stress etc, but I didn't think it was appropriate to have a multi-signature card sent to his widow and two young daughters.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:30, Reply)

Yeah, I really don't think we disagree actually.
The only difference is that if that card was put in front of me and being sent anyway, I wouldn't have refused to sign it. I think both of us agree that being asked to sign it in the first place may not be ideal
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:34, Reply)

This is a bizarre convo in which to establish mutual ground.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:35, Reply)

Well, at least Muamba's situation
has served some good then...
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:36, Reply)

I suppose.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:37, Reply)

His family will appreciate it.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:39, Reply)

I'm sure they are deeply touched by the action of strangers.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:42, Reply)

I was deeply touched by a stranger once.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:47, Reply)

Lucky you.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 16:55, Reply)