How do I fucking swear?
While swearing is permitted on the boards, we prefer more creative forms of profanity:

Portmanteau: twat + cunt = twunt. Can you think of your own?

Animal combos: cock-badger and kitten-flaps have been found to be most effective.

Reversal: by reversing "fuck" and "cock" you can substantially improve your swearing. EG: "Cock off you cocking fucksucker."
Stand out from the crowd and find your own swearing style. Maybe yours will catch on.
(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 8:54, 2 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

I think you do ok, wouldn't worry about it

( Glovington, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 8:55, Reply)

I am so hungover.
Afternoon drinking messes me right up these days.

😞
(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:00, Reply)

The missus was away last night so I drunk a bottle of gin with tonic and lime wedge, on the sofa. when I went to stand up to go to bed I almost fell flat on my face
I enjoyed having the entire bed to myself though for a change
( Glovington, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:02, Reply)

I was woken by a six year old standing on my head
which helped
(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:04, Reply)

that is savage
Children are the worst on a hangover. they have no concept of, if you jump on my stomach I will be sick
( Glovington, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:08, Reply)

my youngest once got so giddy at a festival that she ran up and bit me on the dick
there's no easy way to explain to a toddler why daddy made the piggy squealing noise and collapsed like he'd been shot
(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:21, Reply)

Old Baggenfock'd pay good money for that.

( Kroney, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:22, Reply)

I reckon being castrated and nullod by little sharp milk teeth is a suitable punishment for noncery

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:24, Reply)

haha! like a wee wee tapir!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:00, Reply)

cock off dozers, you dogcocker ahahHjajaja

(old man river possible lesbian, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:01, Reply)