I have, before now
taken bum gas into a meeting and released several aliquots of it during the course of proceedings.

My most embarrassing incident though was when at a conference with my boss. We were staying in a travel inn and the previous evening I'd had something quite potent for dinner. So we were walking to the car in the morning and I felt my guts grumbling.

I opened the tailgate to put our bags in, and went round to the driver's door as my boss went to the passenger side. "Now's the time", I thought and released a brown gas bomb into the atmosphere, expecting it would be dissipated by the wind before I got in the car.

I forgot about the gas-retentive properties of suit trousers though. Wool traps gas quite well, with the result that when I got in the car and sat down, the guff permeated throughout the passenger cabin.

It was so powerful the windows almost dissolved, and I'm sure some of the plastic trim discoloured.

My boss is a polite sort, so didn't say anything but he must have been retching. He's not the sort I could have a laugh about farting with, unfortunately.

I got the fan switched on PDQ though, ostensibly to demist the windows.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 1 Oct 2008, 11:41, Reply)