Amusing things that my sister-in-law says
Please feel free to add on your own amusing (slightly mental) in-laws' amusing quotes.


I'll have to write the main body in the first reply as it's turning out quite long!
(darras jeg har en grevling i hodet. Grevling, grevlang, Fri 23 Jan 2009, 14:05, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

*ahem*
But to tell the story properly. When I was 16 and just going into 6th form at my admittedly rather snobbish grammar school there were obviously some new girls in the classes. Girls that had come in from Comps with the relevant grade requirements, or girls from even snobbier boarding schools. It was at this time that I adopted a girl who was to become my best friend, Rebecca. I have turned into a rather bitter tongued young lady who enjoys a bit of mind play with stupid people when drunk. But I was not always this way! For in that fateful week I took in another girl as well. Out of pity I noticed a girl who didn't seem to be connecting with anybody and waved her over to my table.

Her name was Laura* (names changed just in case!- you can never be too sure.. *twitch*) and she had come down from Hereford (she claimed, although her cries of 'I'm not welsh!' had a fairly distinct welsh accent to them..). We got on okay, with a bit of effort from me. She was a bit of a name dropper, constantly working in the news that her ex-SAS father was bodyguarding for a notable celebrity in the area. I got a bit tired of the name dropping but perservered because I used to be nice back then.

So I went to visit her at her house and we had sleep overs and she came to visit me where she developed a crush on one of my brothers, the younger of the two. However said brother seriously wasn't interested and left the house whenever she arrived. Which I found a constant source of amusement! (I think this is where my temperement took a turn for the nasty).

Eventually, she claimed to want a new activity to do after school, so I invited her along to a session of Aikido, I've trained since I was 7 and it was still very much a large part of my life then. She wasn't very good but then again she was a beginner and it was all friendly. And that is where she met my other brother.

Several years down the line and several nights of trying to plug my ears with anything available so as not to hear the noises from my brother's bedroom I had pretty much stopped being friends with the girl. She was now my brother's girlfriend.

They married when she was 21 (a month younger than me) and she was already three months pregnant at the time with my gorgeous little nephew. While Laura was pregnant, the two of them were remarkably cagey about possible names for their children. We should have seen it coming, but absolutely nobody was expecting Graham Andrew Francis.. Still, it's grown on me a little now. Although, the poor little mite will get bullied when the bigger lads in school get a hold of the register. And then a few years later came Felicity Rosita Emily *shudder* Rosita??

Ah well. But now we come to the funny part!

Laura comes from a family that are doing ok money wise, but nothing special. Absolutely working class. Her mother bought herself a £50 title a few years ago and styled herself Lady. All her letters are adressed to Lady blahblah. And so of course! My sister in law (she of the working my brother to an early grave fame) decides to spend yet more of the money that they haven't got and buy herself a title! Not only that but she adds her own maiden name to her married name in a double barrel in a self proclaimed attempt to sound posher. *snort*

Still, each to their own. It was only recently that I found out she'd bought titles for the kids as well. So now, not only will my poor nephew have to contend with bullies over his name at school. He'll also have to hope for dear life that nobody ever finds out he's enrolled as a Lord!

Laura, despite being of the opinion that it is the man's duty to support the family and the woman's to sit at home on her ass, is studying online to be a doctor. Which I find fairly amusing because she dropped out of school shortly before we took the AS level exams meaning she has barely 7 GCSEs or something. At xmas my little sister was making the effort to be nice to her and said "So! When you're done studying to be a radiologist (funny, when I asked it was GP..) you can work and then my brother can concentrate on the silversmithing instead. That'll be great!"
To which she blithely replies, in ocmplete seriousness "Oh no, it's the man's responsibility to support the family. He'll have to keep working." I wonder what she wants to do with her degree if she gets it.. Wipe her ladyship's ass with it?

And yesterday she was talking to me about having got back 95% or something on a recent essay. I congratulate her on the grade and enquire how long it will be before she can attend school in person to study (I was nice. I could have asked how long it would be before she could go to 'real medicine school'). She answers that she wants to apply to Cambridge in 2013. tihi!

And following this! She then earnestly asks for my opinion on whether, when she becomes a doctor, she should be Dr Lady Laura, or Lady Dr Laura. Because it'll look so good on the headed notepaper!

*weeps*

I'll probably add more later :p
(darras jeg har en grevling i hodet. Grevling, grevlang, Fri 23 Jan 2009, 14:10, Reply)