Two bits of black tarmac walk in to a pub
grab a couple of pints and start talking loudly about how hard they are.

"Oh, I'm definitely the hardest", says the first, "I prop up the Severn Bridge. I got lorries and trucks, tonnes of trucks, rolling over me all day!"

"Yeah?", retorts his friend, "I work on the M25 man, I got all that STOPPED on my back all day long, I get bits of me gouged out every day and put back, I'm definitely the hardest"

The landlord's listening to the quarrel with interest, when all of a sudden, the door of the pub slams open and in stomps a massive bit of green tarmac.

The bits at the bar don't know where to look. They dive under a table and wait. The green tarmac strolls to the bar, orders a double whiskey, downs it whilst looking shiftily at the regulars and strolls out.

The bits of black tarmac crawl out from under the table, much to the landlord's amusement.

"I thought you two were the hardest bits of tarmac that ever lived?", he asked incredulously

"We are!", says the first, "But that guy's a cyclepath!"
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Sun 15 Feb 2009, 21:49, Reply)