*smugs*
I finally sat down yesterday and started writing the novel I've been putting off for the past two years. I've been wanting to try my hand at being an author for a few years and decided that now is the time. I'm not expecting success, then I can't be disappointed, but it'll be fun trying (I hope).
I'm living the dream, yeah baby!

Anyone else embarked on a scary yet exciting adventure recently? Or anyone ever been published and got any tips?
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:03, 37 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I never understood why so many people try to write a novel
It's like me one day waking up and deciding I'm going to make a spaceship
( SuperMatt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:19, Reply)

it's not really is it
whereas even a bad novel can be read it seems unlikely that your homemade spacecraft would even get you to space, let alone keep you alive and motive once there.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:23, Reply)

It amuses me
when people use the phrase "it's not rocket science" when describing something that's easy.

Actually, rocket science isn't particularly difficult.

Rocket engineering, on the other hand...
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:26, Reply)

SuperMatt is actually surprisingly clever.
He built me a nuclear reactor for my birthday :)
( thealternativefact, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:30, Reply)

I'm not denying that he is clever
but suggesting that he couldn't build a spacecraft that would particularly well.

NASA can't and they've got more money and experience.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:36, Reply)

Maybe the point is that many people who announce they're going to write a novel
don't manage to do that very well either.
I am not suggesting this is true of Apeface, of course.
( thealternativefact, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:49, Reply)

This was pretty much my point

( SuperMatt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:50, Reply)

You're probably right
As I said, I don't expect success. But I guess, considering I have a pretty well-developed idea, I'd better give it a shot. If something comes of it, ace. Basically, I'm more smug now at finally starting something I've been wanting to do for a long time. Sort of like when you manage to give up smoking, or pull the bloke you've been after for weeks :o)
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:53, Reply)

If you have an idea for a novel
and you want to do it, then do it. If you enjoy doing it, you've already achieved success on one level.
( thealternativefact, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:59, Reply)

I did understand the point ;-)

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:58, Reply)

Ahh good,
clearly we were speaking slowly enough then.
*laughs*
*runs away at speed slightly faster than tractor*
( thealternativefact, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:59, Reply)

you realise that despite living in the south west
I live in a city, work in an office and don't own a tractor?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 12:03, Reply)

I note the following were not ruled out:
1. piece of straw in mouth at all times
2. yokel hat worn a jaunty angle
3. sit at desk on hay bale
4. 'a' and 'r' keys worn out on keyboard from replying, 'aaarrr' to most e-mails
( thealternativefact, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 12:10, Reply)

I do have a yokel hat
nd point 4 is coect but I don't have straw in mouth, or under arse
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 12:15, Reply)

Hee-hee
Fairy Nuff.
Besides, anyone else pops up taking the piss out of the West Country and you know I'm automatically on your side anyway ;)
( thealternativefact, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 12:17, Reply)

So like someone deciding to write a book
We can assume you have at the very least a basic grasp of rocket science?

Then yes, it is the same.

And Vipros beat me there!

And good on you Apeface, never know if you don't try. It's a goal of mine, but one I haven't made any steps to accomplish.
( Rookie You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:23, Reply)

Thanks matey
Appreciate it!
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:27, Reply)

That's the ticket
Some nice encouragement.
It's not really, is it? It's a creative outlet, something to fill your time, and if you have an idea why not try to make something of it? Even if it doesn't get anywhere, as I said, I will have enjoyed myself having fun. If everyone thought like you, there'd be no books.
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:25, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJnU3Yi02fo&feature=related
( Peej, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:23, Reply)

Brilliant!
I love the way the voice just gets higher and higher
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:27, Reply)

The closest I've come
is being named in the acknowledgements of a biographical book written by a philosopher friend of mine, because I helped him with some of the science.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:24, Reply)

Jealous
Now that's living the dream :)
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:29, Reply)

No wonder everyone wants to have sex with you...

( thealternativefact, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:37, Reply)

You've no idea
I couldn't satisfy the demand even if I had a dozen cocks.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 12:02, Reply)

Excellent
Hope it works out
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:29, Reply)

Cheers
I won't make false promises of updates because it'll probably take me years :)
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:33, Reply)

I was named in a book acknowledgements once
by an insane Spanish ornithologist. I told him how to spell the word "sparrow" correctly. He named me as the book's translator, even though I didn't and the English was fucking awful. Thank god nobody buys books on bird mating habits.

Unfortunately, true story!
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:32, Reply)

I think people who do something creative and put themselves on the line are really brave.
It doesn't matter whether you're 'into' what they produce or not. It's scary to say "look what I did" and wait for the criticism.

Also I have embarked on a scary yet exciting adventure recently.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:36, Reply)

Thanks
Ooh, interesting. What is it? Can we know?
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:37, Reply)

'Fraid not.
It probably wouldn't be that interesting to anyone else anyway.
It did involve me shaking off some baggage, acknowledging a few things about myself, being willing to try new experiences, take a few risks, and not ever put up with mediocrity ever again. If you don't have a fire in your belly for something, stop doing it.
Which I suppose brings us back to your writing. Go for it kid!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:44, Reply)

Thanks again
And good luck / well done on your adventure!
xx
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:46, Reply)

I've not been published...
..but I've somehow won 2 weeks of QOTW, which is (in my eyes at least) a far greater accolade.

It also greatly annoys my housemate - a published journalist - when I lay claim to being the only one in the house who is "an award-winning writer".
( TheMagicDwarf is back like ballroom dancing, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:44, Reply)

My life has no point now after reading your achievements.
Even though I rarely submit QOTW answers anyway. Bah.
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:47, Reply)

*De-smugs*
On a serious note, good on you for giving it a go. Motivation is probably the biggest barrier to overcome, so if you can keep at it that's half the battle won.

The major part of the other half could be your family - my aforementioned journalist housemate is also in the midst of writing a novel. Her dad's questions on her progress are fairly limited: "How many pages is it now, kid? The last book I read was 300 pages, damn good book that one. Make sure you get over the 300 mark and you're laughing"

Wise words indeed.
( TheMagicDwarf is back like ballroom dancing, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:52, Reply)

Indeed
I shall bear them in mind and not stop until I have at least 301 pages, even if it's utter tripe.
Seriously though, I've carefully selected one friend who reads a LOT to be my lab-rat. I know she'll let me know what she thinks. Hope her advice is a little better!
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 11:56, Reply)

one piece of advice I heard from an author I knew
(not sure if she ever got published, but I read her manuscript and it was some really good sci-fi)

advice was: don't talk about your book to people. I can't quite remember what her reasons were, but it fell along the lines that talking to people about your story and characters etc. will cause you to lose it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 12:00, Reply)

Totally
I'm not planning on revealing any of the plot / characters to anyone. Just this one friend who will get some of the chapters from time-to-time, and let me know if it's shite or going in the right direction. I was very pleased that nobody asked me here "What is it about?" to be honest.
Top tip, cheers.
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Wed 5 Aug 2009, 12:04, Reply)