Close to a heart attack
About two years ago my counterpart in a different regional office had emailed the HR boss (cock) at HQ asking him to consider making us excempt from the payfreeze, as we were qualified professionals on £10k per year who had recently had our workloads and responsibilities tripled. Head office was advertising front door receptionists on a higher wage that us news reporters were getting.
The HR boss replied to my mate with a fobb off saying, "yours, along with the circumstances of all others in this company will be considered".
Cock!
Well, my mate forwarded the response to me, and disgusted with it, I replied to my mate saying: "What a fucking arse! He might as well have fucking shat on your desk. Fuck him! I emailed him last week about this, and now I'm going to give the weegie cunt another push!"
As you will have guessed, the programme replied to the original mail, rather than the person who had forwarded it to me, and the Onosecond came instantly - lasting for a good ten seconds of uncertanty until I checked email records to see that it had indeed gone right to the HR cock.
First instinct was to phone him and grovel, pannicking even further when I got only voicemail. Ok, I thought, there's a good chance he's out to lunch. He was miles away in HQ, so no chance of deleting it from his desk.
I knew I was fucked.
Pannick - I phoned up my mate and blurbled a stream of words in the wrong order, which he thought was a joke, and refused to believe I'd just sent the mail to The Cock. Eventually he told me how to retract the mail, which only works on internal emails. To this day, I'll never know if he read it or not before I managed to retract it.
No payrise for me though . . . . . .
(Barry Subchimp, Tue 31 May 2005, 15:06, Reply)