I don't consider myself accident prone...
...but when assessing my last 35yrs + for stories for this QoTW, i find i have plenty to offer.

Aged about 7, playing with friends on our drive where my dad had strategically placed some large concrete flag stones leaning against the wall to be used later. I think it's a good idea to pull one towards me, miscalculate the weight and it falls towards me, i don't get my right foot our of the way quick enough and 'splat'. When we get to A&E, i can see inside my big toe. I pass out. Several weeks of foot in a cast. Itchy.

Aged about 9, walking home from cubs/scouts (whatever it was) on a very cold and icy night. The path angles down slightly and my feet disappear away from me, my head hits the ground hard and the next thing i remember i'm waking in my bed some 12 hrs later with my arm in a sling (cracked collar bone)

My mum says that, during the time at the A&E, I kept asking what my name was, who she was, and where i was. They kept making names up (Mickey Mouse, Bagpuss, etc) knowing i'd forget a short time later.

Aged 19, on holiday with the current Mrs, waterskiing on Windermere. I start to get the hang of it, moving weight from ski to ski and learning how to control. The boat driver suggests i try and go outside the wake, at which point i lean too far forward, ski's dig in and i do a face plant followed by a hyperextension of my legs and my feet kicking the back of my head. Back cracks and a pain like never before. I get out of the lake and spend the next two days sat very still in a chair (rather than going to a hospital like a normal person). I've had regular lower back problems ever since - a cracked vertebrae apparently.

Aged 30 something, doing a job which required me to run after someone, i fell badly tit over feet and bent the tip of my right ring finger backwards which shattered the bone and sent the tendon back up the finger. Operated on to re-attach the tendon with a pin (which was bigger than the finger itself) and then several weeks of boredom. However, the ouch came when removing the stitches. The skin had grown over the 6 stitches and each one had to be dug out before they could get the knife under to cut. it took about two hours. i was sweating like a gerbil in a gaybar.

Then, three months later, i had another op to remove the pin and, yes you guessed, had to have them removed again.

Fuck running.
( Another_tragic_case wished he hadn't eaten all the cake, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:23, Reply)