Trapped Nerve
.. what the Germans call a "Hexenschuss". Somehow, in the middle of making the two-backed beast, I managed to trap a nerve in my spine. This nerve is, apparently, in control of one of the muscles on the left-hand side of your back. And didn't I fucking know it. The pain feels like someone stabbing you with a giant needle, and the muscle doesn't help by spasming every time you make a wrong move. One visit to the weekend surgery and an injection of cortizone later, some relief was obtained. Unfortunately, the injection wore off before bedtime and I was reduced to a shrieking wreck, who had to sleep propped upright on the sofa, as the slightest move stimulated an extremely painful spasm of this muscle.

Did I mention this was right in the middle of the World Cup? It was, and the other half (Her Maj) wasn't going to cancel the viewing party she'd so carefully planned. Cue four germans leaping up and down on the sofa, whilst one pale expat Englander in a cold sweat grimly bites down on a spare cushion.

Finally, Monday, after two agony-filled sleepless nights, I go to the Chiropractor, who X-rays me, and then rolls me into a ball and trys to bend my legs in directions they don't normally go. There follows a loud "CRACK!" from the base of my spine, instant relief, and, shortly after, a 15-hour hibernation, the ability to put socks on without screaming, and a short course of the sort of painkillers that did for Michael Jackson.

Be kind to your spine, folks, because the alternative isn't fun.
( Stevedix http://www.stevedix.de/blog, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 11:50, Reply)