French Oral.
Had spend most of my one year learning GCSE French by teasing the teacher I had something of a platonic love-hate relationship with. In hindsight, I may have been better served by brushing up on my vocab.


Sitting in a small dark room preparing the compulsory phrases I would need to voice next door in mere minutes time, I broke into a feverish perspiration; I knew how to say "I have a little..." but something in my mind froze. Or perhaps it was never there and I simply refused to believe I had such an embarrasing hole in my knowledge?

Either way, I knew that in about 60 seconds time I would be reeling of the line, "Je prends un petit... ...umm ...rabbit".

The feeling I felt as I sat down with the impending recitation of the sentence was like being the first person on a bus to find out the brakes aren't working.

It seemed I was not without some semblance of sink or swim instinct though. I managed to raise my game to the extent of a swarmy french accent - an attempt no doubt to cover up my astonishing lack of vocabulary.

"ehhh... je pronnnndune aaahhhh... pooteeeeaaaahhhh..."

"umm"

Silence.

The tape recorder continued to turn.
For a moment I found it amusing that it recorded even when there was nothing to listen to. Poor little tape recorder, oblivious as to whether his only function in life was being used. Was this really the time to be anthropomorphising objects in the room I asked myself?

I looked up to bulging eyes. I gave her my "I have bad news to tell you" look hoping it might be worth half a mark. Didn't I hear somewhere that they mark you up for a good accent?

To my amazement her mouth began to move.

At first I could not figure out what was going on - for goodness sake, the tape was running ! - this was no time to be gaping like carp, surely? Realisation flushed through me in an instant - focus - read her lips.

"errr... ois.

bon.

je prends un...

ahhhhh, petit..."

My eyebrows raised with the incredulity of what was about to be said,

"rabah?"

She sat back in her chair.

After a moment, I sat back in mine.
(Ged, Sat 16 Oct 2004, 2:08, Reply)