I smacked my PE teacher with a rake!
I was a "tubby" child (and tubby adult too) so a lot of the times i had a note to get out of PE, as i couldnt even run round ONE football field without being humilliated so the thoughts of being forced round 5 filled me with dread (as that was the WARM UP), So one week when it was an olympics time they where doing long jumps and i got roped in to rake the sand over, after about 7/8 jumpers i got told my raking was not up to parr so the PE teacher took the rake from me and enthusiasticly showed me how to do it, after 3/4 rakes he handed me back the rake saying "thats how you do it you big tub of lard" now im not a violent person, infact i took more beatings than i should have being my hight and build at school, but i would back out of confrontation, today however the sound of everyone laughing at me sent my blood boiling, so after the next jumper he looked at me told me to use the rake.... i swung back as hard as i could and swung with all my might clean across his face, untill that moment i never knew you could literally knock someone out cold... but when he hit the floor in a heap he was snoaring and rolling his eyes, pandemonium then let loose as i just sat down and laughed, next thing i know im in the headmasters office.... with a rather brused P.E. teacher stood behind me, I explained the situation and how he had publicly humiliated me, then pointed out that it was bullying from the staff (i was way too savy for my age) I got told to go away and come back in the next day, so i appeared, halfway through my second lesson i got pulled out and took to the headmasters office, There i was given a rather poulty and begrudged appology from my P.E. teacher... my headmaster said "I think we can call an end to this" to which i replied "no, I don't think so... you see, he publicly humiliated me, and i have now been took away to a quiet corner whilst he admits fault, i want a public apology, say in assembely..." there was a silence, then a comment from my headmaster "i think your asking too much, after all you attacked one of my staff"
so i said "yes, only after severe provocation, should we see what the education authority has to say about that?"
More silence continued,

anyway, 3 days went by and on the thursday i was PUBLICLY appologised to by my PE teacher in assembely... for some funny reason, he left that year! no idea why as he was bragging that he would be head of PE the next year!
( tim1701 I have no board signature!!!!!, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 0:36, 9 replies)

Brilliant!
Do you become a lawyer by any chance?
(Subway Riding the rails underground, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 2:20, closed)

^^Exactly what I was thinking

( Snappyuk gets BIGGER with free sample., Wed 25 Nov 2009, 11:53, closed)

Needs moar punctchewashun...

( TheMattInAHat has a particular... odour..., Wed 25 Nov 2009, 8:23, closed)

^^
Without it all I can do is imagine a hyperventilating 13 year old boy telling this story while running away from his PE teacher, Beano style.
(mmmm curry doesn't really understand this sig lark, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 11:59, closed)

Were you tubby because you didn't do the laps...
Thus sending you into a vicious circle of tubbiness?
(The Kwyjibo A big, dumb, balding North American ape., Wed 25 Nov 2009, 10:21, closed)

Needs more 'needless to say, I had the last laugh'.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 11:31, closed)

T'is a touch partridge isn't it.....
No i didnt become a lawyer, my brother did though! I just went on to make adverts for radio stations and weep at the pittance of pay i get all the time thinking, if only i would have run those laps, i would be slim and pennyless!
( tim1701 I have no board signature!!!!!, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 15:38, closed)

This needs to happen more :D
brilliant stuff *clicks*
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 18:30, closed)

A Good One Sir!
Thank you from another alsoran

*click*
.
(whiskas loved by 8 out of 10 cats, Wed 25 Nov 2009, 22:00, closed)