Oh dear
I have many.

First, motorbikes. I ride a beat up 125 to work. Started riding in october, been doing 40 miles a day through winter, starting at about 0630 every morning.
Now it is summer, the plastic crotch rockets are out in force up our roads. They appear to think it is their private race track, and someone is always killed by one every year. It gives me, and those like me a bad name.

Then there are the arses in tin boxes. Yes, I'm sitting at 30 in a 30 zone. Funny that. What with the plod eager to put 3 points on my licence for speeding, me only passing my full (expensive) test a few week back, and relying totally on that bike-why wouldn't I do warp factor 11? And no, I don't mind you overtaking an inch from my right hand.

And the retards on peds, or those 125 "racing" bikes. It is you, who crash and speed and act like dicks, that bump up my insurance. Ditto thoe same folk in cars, who ensure I can't imagine running one for several years because of premiums.

Fat kids too, especially chavs. I was sat in Dads car at a petrol station. I watched as a mound of blubber consumed some of those cheese string things. Shiny sweaty face, long, greasy straggly hair and a sweat stained T shirt. Fat fingers tearing up whatever toxic shite he was eating, and stuffing that blubbery maw. Then the inability to shut his mouth whilst masticating. Such people shouldn't live.

15 year olds who thing they are hard by failing at school. Yep, you ensured I hated secondary school. What are you up to now? Usually dead end job in a chippy. Or on benefits, which means I'm geting £150 a month less partly to support your lazy arse. Can't we swap them for illegal immigrant workers? At least they actually, you know, work.

House prices. Isn't it marvellous that a rabit hutch is worth £20million. Not really, it means I'm still sharing a room with 2 little brothers. I hope the sub prime fiasco breaks you, you smug twats.

Anyway, can't be too cross for long. I've finally got my vintage bike on the road, so can annoy everyone else by vibrating along at 40 leaving a trail of blue smog. Yay!
( Greenbat, Sat 3 May 2008, 22:08, 2 replies)

Blubbery Maw
That's clickworthy right there.

Vintage what? Triumph? BSA? or are you talking vintage like a 1970's Yamaha FS1E or a FS1E-DX if you really want to go high-tech.
(Lurkaloid awarded wanking black belt on, Sun 4 May 2008, 0:45, closed)

BSA Bantam
D14/4, 1968. Lovely little stroker, always feels like she's really pleased to be blatting about. Once I had to ride a scooter, it felt as though it wanted to die.
( Greenbat, Sun 4 May 2008, 17:01, closed)