Shopping Trolleys in Parking Spaces*
Is there any stronger indication of the sewer-bound direction of society than the practice of leaving shopping trolleys in parking spaces? Picture the scene; You've unwisely chosen to shop at Tesco on a Saturday afternoon, along with every sod and his dog. You crawl around the car-park in first gear, searching for that elusive space, as does the queue of cars behind you. At last! You spot a gap! But it's only as you pull up to it that you realise it isn't free; Some lazy cockwad has chosen to leave their trolley in it. You can't get out and move it for fear of the queue behind you lynching you there and then. So you have to carry on to Zone Z (you know, the part of the car-park where the more energetic BMW drivers park across two spaces).

What in the name of bollocks possesses people to leave their trolley in a space? No wonder the nation as a whole has a BMI of 412, when the average lardbucket considers the ten-foot walk to the nearest trolley-shelter is a bit too much. What's wrong with you, you lazy fucker? Worried you'll miss the beginning of Ant and Dec? Can't be arsed? Whatever it is, you clearly think nothing of offloading your problem onto a complete stranger, leaving them to deal with your tidying up. It's like a distilled reminder of what's wrong with the world today; Endless hordes of selfish tossrods who fart their way through life, dumping their problems onto the rest of us, expecting someone else to clean up after them. Odious, lazy cuntflags.

* NB 'Shopping Trolleys in Parking Spaces' would also make a good album track title for the Enemy, Hard-Fi, Reverend and the Makers or any other lumpy Virgin-Radio stodge-rock group, don't you think?
(costas, Sun 4 May 2008, 21:29, 4 replies)

Wouldn't...
...the resulting walk from zone 'Z' subsequently lower the national BMI, though?

Just saying...

Hell, I kid. It's a sheer pain in the arse. I had to go through a similar effort at Glasgow International a few days ago with people who'd somehow decided taking luggage carts over was a good idea, but couldn't be buggered putting them out of the way. Result? The ONE space on the ground floor has a baggage trolley in it. Instead, I have to park on the TOP floor of the cunting airport and lug my stuff all the way down.

Sheer joy.
(HomeWithTheDownies A towering inferno of penisy pleasure, Mon 5 May 2008, 0:46, closed)

I
wouldn't be surprised if that's the title of the next U2 album.
(Waspard has your wank bank account details, Mon 5 May 2008, 1:16, closed)

I shouted at an oxygen thief
who left her trolley in a disabled bay yesterday. I'm not disabled, but felt sorry for the next poor sod who would have to move it to get to their space. She looked a bit perturbed and moved it, looking back at me all the while.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 5 May 2008, 18:07, closed)

The bit that annoys me more...
Not the fact that they have left them sitting about the place, rude as it is. But the fact they are unrestrained and free to trundle off into a mass of cars when the wind blows. It is bad enough when some fucker bashes your car through carelessness and idiotic driving, but when I am left with the repair bill because some fuckwit has left the trolley sitting in the open, then it gets blown across the carpark into my car.

I remember reaching my car the other day *just* in time to catch a trolley doing a good 15mph rocketing across from the other side of the carpark after some fuckwit had left it out on a windy day. Seconds later there would have been a rather nasty mess in place of where the brand new and previously spotless door panel had been.

So you either have a choice of parking in the malestrom next to the door, risking getting bashed by idiots that can't park and kids who just swing open the doors until they hit something. Or park in th equieter area and risk the speeding trolleys of damage.
(442, Wed 7 May 2008, 11:29, closed)