b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Phobias » Post 141748 | Search
This is a question Phobias

What gives you the heebie-jeebies?

It's a bit strong to call this a phobia, but for me it's the thought of biting into a dry flannel. I've no idea why I'd ever want to or even get the opportunity to do so, seeing as I don't own one, but it makes my teeth hurt to think about it. *ewww*

Tell us what innocent things make you go pale, wobbly and send shivers down your spine.

(, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 13:34)
Pages: Latest, 36, 35, 34, 33, 32, ... 1

« Go Back

Toxoplasmosis
Cats are dirty dirty sponging con-artists. They subvert gullible folk into thinking they're all 'cwoot and fluffeh' while taking complete liberties left right and centre.

What's more, their owners (marks) are so deluded that they find it amusing that their little parasitic feline will spend half the day outside then come back and shit in your house (I don't care if it's in a special plastic tray!) so you have to clean it up. The process of cleaning it up then exposes you to the brain-leeches in their shit that can actually change your cognitive functions to make you even more gullible and accepting of their liberties until you die of a massive brain tumor.

The cherry on this particular dung-pile is that they come complete with a whole range of other parasites of their own. Not just leeching your hard-won resources themselves, but coercing you into providing for their own colony of parasitic beasties.

Dirty, Dirty b@stards.

For this reason (and more) I do not break for cats, preferring to accellerate and swerve toward them, thus doing the world a service.
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 9:43, 11 replies)
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH
Its "BRAKE"

*tears out hair*
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 9:54, closed)
Ha ha!
I was about to say the same thing MJF...
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 10:11, closed)
Don't be so pedantic you two!
It's not a bad post, both of you need a better hobby.

/also hates cats.
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 10:15, closed)
I don't hate them
but despite themselves they have fooled the world into thinking they are smart, when actually they are stupid as hell

considerably stupider than dogs
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 10:31, closed)
toxo
probably not such a problem unless you're immunocompromised in some way, but anyway, cats are rubbish no matter what their parasites.
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 11:21, closed)
SORRY!! *grovels & stoops apologetically*
I feel such utter utter shame at having made such a pathetic and obvious grammatical flaw.

I too, am annoyed by the phenomenal misuse of their / there / they're etc. My writing isn't shit-hot, but I assure all that such a flaw would usually be corrected within seconds of posting.

In mitigation, I've contracted the man-flu and am feeling like cack, which isn't helped by these pesky distractions from my salary providers.

*Stoops lower*
*Doffs cap*
*Licks boots*

PS - I'm leaving it there as a reminder to read over my posts.
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 11:29, closed)
Sorry...
I'm a cat person (even though we have a dog, who is lovely if a little retarded). Dog shit carries toxicara, and although many dog owners are responsible and pick their dogs crap up (and thereby end up looking ridiculous carrying a nappy sack full of steaming turd), most of them don't and so potentially expose far more people to an equally debilitating virus.

And yes, I also know that many cat owners let their moggies shit in other people's gardens before anyone starts.

Cats are relatively independant and can be left to their own devices overnight, maybe even two if enough dried food and water is left out. Whereas dogs are a bit like babies - completely tying unless you're willing to pay through the nose to board them in kennels so you can go on a dirty weekend somewhere (or cultural visit if you like).

It's said that people are generally split into two camps - dog people and cat people. Dog people invariably choose canine companions because they like to be able to give a command and be obeyed, thereby asserting their mastery. Cat people choose feline companionship because they admire the independant spirit of the animals, and are somewhat free-spirited themselves as people.

Allegedly :-)

Sorry - I like cats. End of.
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 11:50, closed)
I don't think I'm either a dog nor cat person.
I'm a parent, therefore have a much more amusing, tying, efficient-wallet-emptying living companion.

To dissuade poor people from becoming the victim of these feline hustlers, I would heartily recomend lagomorph living companions. They are even less tying than cats, cwootier and fluffeh-er and charmingly shy to begin with. Their sh!t doesn't stink half as much, although they can be equally litter-trained. They also don't bring disease riddled wildlife cadavers into your home.
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 12:02, closed)
gah
*begin parasite pedantry*
Toxocara sp are helminths, i.e. worms, and tend not to kill folk. worming your dog can prevent transmission of this worm, and thus it becomes less of a problem. you can also get them from cats. (Toxocara canis vs Toxocara felis).

Toxoplasma gondii is a protist, i.e. single celled organism, what lives in the brain and causes lots of nasty problems, particularly in HIV/AIDS patients and other immunocompromised folk. it is VERY nasty once the disease develops.

*end parasite pedantry*

dogs are just better.
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 12:39, closed)
Each to their own I suppose
You're probably more likely to get run over crossing the road than catch anything nasty from cat / dog shit. However I wouldn't advocate staying in for the rest of your life 'just in case'.

As for children... again, each to their own. Never wanted any myself, a fact that seems to render some people speechless with incredulity. It's not that I don't like them per se, it's just I hold absolutely no parental desires whatsoever. That said, I am probably the closest thing that sweary junior has to a father figure, and I'll do my best by him. Even if I do fuck up spectacularly on the odd occassion...

*edit* Plus, dogs are known to eat their own shit - what's all that about? (Actually, it's about not getting enough goodness from their diet of processed ash, lips and nails, or so I'm told. Our dog is fed on raw bones, mince, chicken wings, tripe and liquidised vegetables and as a result is so healthy it's sickening).
(, Tue 15 Apr 2008, 13:13, closed)

« Go Back

Pages: Latest, 36, 35, 34, 33, 32, ... 1