Is it classed as public when it involves a bunch of stoned lads waiting outside a window in Amsterdam for their mate to finish?
A few years ago a group of about 11 of us went to Amsterdam for a weekend. This was as a send of to Gaz, who was buggering back off to South Africa to live, and the trip to the Dam was his idea. Most of the people there were just passing acquaintances of mine, apart from Gaz and his cousin Dave, whom I knew quite well.

And so we arrived and pretty soon found ourselves holed up in a nice little hash bar where we got ourselves nicely stoned and more than a little bit pissed. Then a tour of the cultural highlights was suggested - namely the red light district and, er, a fast food outlet selling massive pizzas. I say massive; they looked big but our collective mental states probably meant that actually, they were probably quite average.

Now, I was there for the trip and the company and nothing else (even though I was single at the time). The idea of paying for sex has never held any appeal to me. But one or two of the lads had different ideas.

Including Gavin. Gavin was there as a favour to his sister, who happened to be going out with one of the lads on the trip. A bit shy and awkward, but seemed a nice enough chap. We had been wandering around the red light district in a distinctly monged haze, when he stopped to look in one of the windows. “She’s gorgeous”, exclaimed he, slightly slurred.

“Well, what are you waiting for”? came an equally slurred reply from one of the group.

After some gentle cajoling by some of the group (and probably fuelled by the alcohol and weed a bit) he got up some courage and went off to the window, disappearing inside like a seasoned professional. After fifteen minutes of us waiting around outside, wondering where the next slice of pizza was coming from (and one or two trying to sneak a peak through the tiniest of cracks in the curtains), Gavin emerged, triumphantly making a show of zipping up his flies as he did so. And then he uttered the words that reduced 10 thirty-something stoned-as-a-heathen-in-biblical-times blokes to a quivering mass of hysterics…

“Lovely, that. Mind, she was tight”…
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 14:42, 1 reply)

The first time I was in the 'Dam.
You can tell the Brits there, they're usually the loudest and most pissed.
This Geordie came down the stairs from her window, to applause from his mates. He had his hands clenched in the air, like a prize fighter. One of the guys asks how much it cost. I'll always remember the immortal reply; "I told her I only wanted a quickie, so she charged me 10 guilders."
Even 20 odd years ago, that was nothing. Just over 3 quid. Classy.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 24 Apr 2009, 12:28, closed)