As a Surrey boy
I can't join in any of these depraved tales of the underclasses, so I'll tell you a related one.

I was staying at the house of a girlfriend (horsey Sally), and I crept downstairs in the night to get a glass of water.

I hadn't been seeing her for very long, and when I went upstairs I wasn't 100% sure which room she was in. left or right? left or right... right.

I crept in, put my water down and climbed into bed. Spooning my horsey partner, as I am told is polite, it struck me that her legs were even horsier than usual, if that was at all possible.

That was when the very camp voice of her landlord rang out "I can't say for sure sweetheart, but I'm pretty sure you've got the wrong room".
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Fri 24 Apr 2009, 16:49, 1 reply)

*click*
*cringe*
*click*
*cringe*
( ejlflop errrrrgs. Regularly., Fri 24 Apr 2009, 23:17, closed)