Sorry...
I wouldn't usually do this - but this one's not me, it's a friend.

(This really isn't funny, by the way.)

A friend of mine (we shall call him N, to save him embarrassment) had been out for the evening on Tuesday this week. One drink had turned to two, two to four and four to many. All of which led to him having to get the Night Bus home.

He clambered aboard, went up the stairs, and sat down.

This was his first mistake. He sat at the back of the bus.

A stop or so later, a group of young guys get on the bus, and take exception to the fact that N is sitting in what they deem to be 'their' seats.

It was now that N, in hindsight, made his second mistake. He tried to argue his way out of it. The only problem (in this situation) was that he is extremely camp, which only added to the ire of these knuckle-dragging cavemen.

According to reports, he then took a severe beating from these guys. They kicked and punched him around between them like some kind of grotesque hacky sack. Eventually he managed to get away, and escape down the stairs - running past the people who had just turned a blind eye to this horrific assault. The driver let him off the bus and, blood streaming in to his eyes, N ran in to the road.

And got hit by a car. Which was doing 30mph.

All things considered, he's lucky to be alive. He's having an operation to have a few metal plates put in to his face, and he'll need to have some false teeth to replace the ones he lost. He'll also have to wear a cast for some broken bones, and will be in hospital for a few weeks yet.

Now that is a nightmare journey home. :(

Cheers N, get well soon fella!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 30 May 2008, 10:35, 6 replies)

Bloody hell!
He's lucky to have been hit by one of the few cars on the road that actually do 30 mph.
( girlinthehole, Fri 30 May 2008, 10:44, closed)

That's fuckin' rubbish
Sorry to hear that.
*sends invisible sympathy waves*
( Cawl, Fri 30 May 2008, 10:56, closed)

what the fuck is wrong with people
so someone is sitting in their "cool" seats on the bus.

that's no reason to beat the shit out of someone. this sort of shit is the reason we need to bring back corporal and capital punishment.

stick them in the stocks, see if that deters the fuckers, if that doesn't work then they have given up their right to live.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 30 May 2008, 11:01, closed)

^^
what Vipros said.

*sends sympathy and get well vibes to N*
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Fri 30 May 2008, 11:05, closed)

Agree with all of the above
*joins in collective internet hugs sending*
(Bazongaloid, Fri 30 May 2008, 11:07, closed)