Various
A few moderately amusing tales, in the hope that quantity will compensate for quality.

1. A friend was enjoying an after-work drink with three colleagues, in a pub that served an ale by the name of Four Fingers. His round came around, and he asked the barmaid for sixteen Fingers. He only noticed when she started pouring the eleventh pint.

2. Post-summer exams drinking session, and the first time I got a drink tipped over me by a lady. Being a student in the Computer Science department, there were very few girls on my course, but C was one of them, and was generally as dedicated a drinker as any of the lads. Towards the end of the evening, I because vaguely aware of something damp hitting me - C was flicking droplets of cider at me, for some reason. As I was drinking Newky Brown for some reason, like-for-like retaliation really wasn't possible - instead, I tried to slosh a bit of ale in her direction (I may have overdone it a bit). Things got out of hand at that point - she tipped the rest of her pint over my head, so I tipped the bottle of Newky Brown over her (possibly taking the world record for the most time taken to throw a drink at someone), she then tipped most of the remaining drinks on the table on me.

3. Went to a Halloween fancy dress party at a friend of a friend's a couple of years back. Most of the people I knew didn't really make an effort, I went as Satan (no point doing things by half measures). Black shirt, trousers and waistcoat, red tie, horns and face painted red. I have a goatee anyway, so it works quite well. Oh, did I mention the huge ~6ft demon wings? Anyway, the party was moderately enjoyable, we stayed maybe 45 minutes before getting bored and heading into town. My mates decided that the best venue for the evening's entertainment would be a rather seedy lapdancing club - admittedly the first time I'd been to one. Now I embarrass easily, and I'm socially awkward at the best of times, so walking into such an establishment as the only person in fancy dress was rather... well, traumatic. I'm sure many chaps would be delighted at the amount of attention I got - the only plus point in my view was that the red facepaint covered my furious blushing quite effectively.
(Photon wasting your time since, Fri 6 Feb 2009, 23:37, Reply)