now THIS is dedication to the cause
some aussie guys i knew were going out for a works meal then hitting the walkabout for a spot of booze and slag-fondling. i met up wit hthem after the meal.. they left early because one of them had overdone the red wine, leaned back, yacked up a lake of half-digested pasta, and just walked out leaving a restaurant full of horrified staff and coworkers. he was still up for drinking though!
the second aussie guy was seemingly a lot more chipper. we got in to the walkabout, got him some beers, (this is summer so shorts weather= this is important to remember)
he started chatting up this girl, seemed to be making good headway. then disaster struck.
he tells me he tried to sneak out a fart, thinking as you do that in a crowd it would be easy to pass the blame.

what happened was about a pint of molten arse-lava came boiling out of his arse like old faithful, and poured out of his beige-coloured shorts onto the dance floor. he uttered the now immortal line
' sorry love, i'll be right back, i think i've shit meself!
and waddles out of the club, stinking like a dead dog on a hot day.

the fucker walked the mile or so home as no taxi would touch him, showered, changed, sauntered back in to the club an hour later, AND STARTED CHATTING UP THE SAME GIRL AGAIN!!!!

hats off to ya mate, wherever you are now, you're a fucking LEGEND.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 8:58, 3 replies)

Ahahahaha
hahahaha. Was he successful?
(Mr._F is not actually a man- this username is a lie!, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 9:10, closed)

unsurprisingly not.
it might be the walkabout, but the lady was obviously a little TOO classy for the venue, and didn't appreciate his 'moves'
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 9:19, closed)

hahaha
10 outta 10 for effort though :D
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 10:34, closed)