Travellers
I once witnessed a young Irish Gypsy couple having an argument; well the polite, demure looking girl of about 19 was having an argument AT her hapless husband who had provoked her fury.

As the row was about to start she calmly said that her and hubby had something to 'chat' about and went inside their house (yes I know, house , travellers, but it was not on wheels). She then proceeded to tear into him while he protested his innocence.

At the height of her verbal onslaught that was audible to anyone on the council estate in question (Northfields in Leicester) she screamed the memorable line........ "Ya pig's cunt ye".
(Barnetboy, Sun 29 Sep 2013, 15:29, 11 replies)

Feckin' pikeys.

( Infidel , shit and wrong, Sun 29 Sep 2013, 20:25, closed)

I fuckin hate pikeys

(boarders You won't catch me with my trousers, Sun 29 Sep 2013, 23:16, closed)

Good dags. D'ya like dags?

(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Mon 30 Sep 2013, 9:58, closed)

Gotta birra tar left over from anudder job,
Do ya droiveway mate? Feckin proper loike. Me an' de boys, guaranteed, foive hundrid should do it an' oim cuttin' off me nose, d'ye knowwhaddamean.
( Infidel , shit and wrong, Mon 30 Sep 2013, 10:48, closed)

Ages ago I was working on a farm near Reading, milking the pigs or some shit, and some bloke who could barely string two words together pulled up in a shittly old truck and offered to "tar" the dirt road for 100 pounds.

It sounded too stupid to be real, so I told him to fuck off. I mean, who the fuck randomly drives around with a load of hot bitumen, cold calling on farms to try and sell the shit? Where the fuck would they get it from? And why was this inbred allowed to have a fucking truck licence in the first place?

When I retold the story over dinner, the Farmer assured me that there is indeed a special type of person that drives around doing just exactly that, selling stolen tar and gravel. I thought it was an urban myth, but I've witnessed it first hand.

Fucking strange thing to try and offload, I could imagine them selling stolen ciggies and booze, but fucking stolen roadbase?

It must be some backward rite of passage to offload your first tonne of shitty gravel.
( Ken Oath, Mon 30 Sep 2013, 12:32, closed)

Tarmac yer drive?
is pretty much a chat up line for these boys.
Yes it's real alright.
These pikeys are completely indistinguishable from each other and almost a parody of themselves. That said, it really doesn't pay to get on the wrong side of them. I once witnessed a huge brawl break out when about 40 families were being evicted from a farmer's field and two tried to go through the gate at the same time.The poor local cops stood back and watched car after uninsured car empty of huge scarred bare knuckle fighters, who soon got down to some serious action. We tired of watching and took the tractor back to the farm. They started shooting about 5 minutes later.
( Infidel , shit and wrong, Tue 1 Oct 2013, 3:26, closed)

They're even in the US.
I seriously had a guy with an Irish accent do that exact spiel in Virginia. I looked around for Guy Richie, but I guess he was hiding.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 30 Sep 2013, 21:27, closed)

I used to know a guy who said yes when asked if they could do his drive...
Reckoned they did the best job he'd ever seen, far better than any other driveway work he'd seen before.

I don't know enough about drives to comment on the veracity of this fact.
( skullfunkerry In case of implosion do not look into implosion, Tue 1 Oct 2013, 12:16, closed)

And then he gave her a kicking.

(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 14:30, closed)

I lived in Northfields for a year
and I didn't even get burgled,
yep,
surprised me too
(AndySpanners not working too hard on, Wed 2 Oct 2013, 16:19, closed)

True
There are some immaculate houses on the estate, but on two occasions as I got out of my car a youth shouted "Are you Police?" just because I was wearing chinos.
(Barnetboy, Thu 3 Oct 2013, 11:57, closed)