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This is a question Relief

Last week, I thought we'd run over and killed something. After steeling myself to get out and find the body of somebody's beloved pet, I found we'd squished a bin bag. When has something turned out not as grim as you first thought?

(, Thu 20 Dec 2012, 12:38)
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Hold up a moment here, she's copus mentis yet spends her days writhering around on the floor and moaning?
I thought compus mentis is that you had your were alright in the head. That doesn't sound like the actions of someone who is compus mentis. And just so you know, she's the reason your'e there. Whats the point in getting into such a potentially rewarding job if you're going to be that inhumain?
(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 14:12, 2 replies)
It's almost as if he's proud of being incompetent and emotionally retarded.
Or "Australian" to use the vernacular.
(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 15:13, closed)
Stop being so racist, you're thinking of south africans.

(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 15:48, closed)
All those southern hemisphere lobsters look the same to me.

(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 16:36, closed)
Maybe I had become too inured to what went on in that house but I have to ask
how exactly was I inhumane?

EDIT: You are right about "compus mentis" tho. Ok without giving identities away or getting too indepth - she was nonverbal but could understand everything said to her. Her primary method of communicating was to smile when she was happy with something and shout (incomprehensibly) & throw stuff at the staff/clients when she was unhappy with something. Or to a lesser degree, roll around on the floor, moaning and often getting underfoot (often to gain attention) - we did have behavior management plans in place for that but as I said it was a staff meeting, she was the only client at home, we left her to it.
She was fairly ambulant - her gait was a little uneven due to her CP but other than that she could quite easily move around when she wanted to.

Whats the point in getting into such a potentially rewarding job if you're going to be that inhumain?
Ok. followed my own advice to AB. Stopped & taken a breath.
To answer your question - a paycheck.
There was nothing very noble about being a "social trainer" or "residential aide". Often it came down to being a glorified cook/cleaner & bum-wiper. & I'm not exaggerating.
We got paid (probably still are) less than a factory monkey got. I know because I was a union rep for the enterprise bargaining agreement (a kinda collective work contract) before I left that organisation and the field. Occasionally you had great days where you could come away with a sense of achievement but most of the time (depending on what sort of clients you were working with) I came away frustrated and smelly. Which is 1 of the reasons I no longer work as a carer. I'm guessing from your tone that you do or have worked as a carer and I'm sure there would be somethings we could share - everyone puts in and takes away something different.
Unless you are Anne - in which case, fuck off!
(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 17:49, closed)
Because your attitude to her is parallel to that of someone in McDonalds who can't get the chip basket out of the fryer.
You see her as someone who got in your way, and although she might be really annoying, she's still people. She wouldn't choose that life. She could possibly hear and process what you're saying, but I don't think her understanding (including consiquence) was quite that of someone with full mental facilities intact.

As someone in charge with her care, I would have thought some more understanding would have come your way. But I wasn't there, it can't have been easy.
(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 18:51, closed)
Just replying to your edits, two secs.

(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 18:51, closed)
It seems a bit silly if you're only working for a paycheque, and not only that, the paycheque is insubstantial to your requirements.

(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 18:54, closed)
To say you do a job
(no matter how noble you may see it I can't see it as a vocation) or vocation for no reward - financial or otherwise is just naive.
Clearly that wasn't my only job or you would've been right and my missus & I would've starved. We didn't.
(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 19:24, closed)
That's not what I said, I said to _only_ do a job because of a paycheque, seems silly; a terrible waste.
It's not entirely clear you had a second job, on account of no mention of any other job and the vast majority of people in 'care giving' field having that as their only job.

Was your second job not important enough to hire you full time?
(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 20:56, closed)
Again Ihave to say I think that's a little naive
We all work for some kind of payoff, be it recognition, financial gain, personal power etc.
In my case at that time I worked to pay the rent, put food on the table for me & my missus, have some cold beer in the fridge at the end of a long, hard shift and squirrel a bit away each week so that sometimes we could afford something nice.
Now my motivations to work a quite different but as I said, I still work for a payoff of 1 kind or another.
The 2nd job was cookie with a catering company - I wouldn't have wanted it fulltime either way as I hate "hospitality" hours (late nights etc.). It was just an income supplement.
(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 21:25, closed)
Is there much demand for after-10pm cookies? That sounds awesome. I'm not sure I would class mass manfacturing of food with the same as Hospitality.
Yes, again, you've missed my point. We all work for a pay-off, but for that _________only_____ pay off to be money, seems sad to me.
(, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 13:31, closed)
cookie = cook.
Back then, at that age with the qualifications and skills I had then I'm not ashamed to say that making sure the bills and rent were paid was a fairly BIG motivator to work. If that was my only motivator now then yes I would have to agree with you - that would be quite sad.
Being a carer is a had job (both mentally & physically) - I did it for a good while & I was quite good at it. For every day where I was an inhumane monster (according to you guys) there were days where a client might achieve a milestone and my job was great - even if it was something as inconsequential as communicating the need to go to the dunny having worn a nappy for most of their lives.
As I have said carers tend to have a high burnout rate - I'm fortunate that I saw my limit and got out of the field when I did of my own choice rather than just stay in the job for a paycheck and become so jaded that I just didn't care at all.
(, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 22:37, closed)
"eight years" "cook/cleaner & bum-wiper"

(, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:07, closed)
I did it for 8 odd years and then I got out
(see the "Anne" link). Yes - the field has a high burnout rate. It took me more than 8 years. That was about 12 years ago too.
In light of these facts my attitude now may be somewhat different to what it was when I started the job. I don't agree with your comparisons but neither am I defending my current attitude.
EDIT: I must also say that you seem to be extrapolating a lot about a situation you have no knowledge of (as to my relationships to the clients I worked with). I have tried to express myself clearly whilst still keeping confidentiality and my duty of care - if I have have failed to be clear & concise I do apologise for that. But do be wary of making assumption.
(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 19:21, closed)
It's OK, you don't have to justify yourself to me. What I think is irrelevant to you. I can only form an opinion on the facts given.
I'm only talking about the regard you hold this single client of yours.
(, Tue 1 Jan 2013, 20:59, closed)
I've worked as a carer.
You were incompetent and emotionally retarded. And you seem to be comfortable with the fact that you did something for which you had no competence or affinity for a shitty wage for eight years. No wonder you have such low expectations. Although the most depressing thing is that Australia has such a dearth of talent that they have to keep people like you employed.
(, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:53, closed)
It genuinely warms my cockles
to know that you've had to wipe someone else's arse other than your child or a loved ones.

I'm happy to be in the same boat as you for a change Shambo.
(, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 12:50, closed)
We're not even in the same ocean.

(, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 17:32, closed)
I often wonder about the planet!
I have to bite here because - beyond your usual abuse you've given a little morsel of info.
How exactly by assisting in saving one of my clients using skills that I had learnt previously did I come to be perceived in your mind as incompetent and an emotional "retard"? Nice choice of words btw.
Do, please elucidate.
(, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 21:27, closed)
You don't need quotes around the word "retard". It was meant in its usual and literal sense.

(, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 22:18, closed)
Nice answer Professor Shambleston.
(, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 22:42, closed)
You need a comma after the word "answer".

(, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:04, closed)

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