Quit from a non paying job
I was giving my 18 month old son his usual nighttime bath last night and decided to get in the bath with him (Believe me its like trying to handle a live fish when you try to do it at the side of the bath and I seem to get less water on me when I'm actually in the tub). After the initial wash, rinse and piss about with various kiddie toys floating in the tub I decided to wash my hair too by submerging my head underwater while sonny boy played with his water wheel attached to the bath.

One of the things I usually do when bathing my son is come up for air showing only my head and yell "Boo!" at him (this may sound stupid but he's 18 month old so its comedy gold for him). Last night was different. I pulled my head back above water ready to yell boo and looked up, mouth agape at the sight before me. My son was stood there evil smil across his chops and aiming his cock at my face......what followed can only be described as a mad rush to escape the bath and my own piss filled mouth yelling "ARGHWHATTHEHELLYOULITTLESOD!!!!!"

I told my missuis that I had quit the job as kid washer shortly after brushing my teeth so hard that my gums bled.
(mon bison powered by magnets, Fri 23 May 2008, 11:31, 8 replies)

Hehe!
Never underestimate the evil thoughts that go on in kids brains....NEVER.
( girlinthehole, Fri 23 May 2008, 11:40, closed)

Kids eh...
Who'd have 'em..

And 'click' :-)
(uk_viper stopped lurking on, Fri 23 May 2008, 11:43, closed)

how long did you hold your breath?
"Gold" (literally)....+click
(fatbob pfffft…, Fri 23 May 2008, 11:58, closed)

Fatbob
Didnt hold it for long enough, I did wonder if the little bugger held it in until he knew he had the chance to piss all over my face.

Bloody kids
(mon bison powered by magnets, Fri 23 May 2008, 12:08, closed)

*Click*
I have a 19 month old girl. At least I don't have the additional problem of trajectory to worry about.

They definitely know what they're doing with piss much sooner than they let on to us. My daughter can skilfully choose the ten seconds between removing her nappy and getting into the bath to joyfully piss all over the floor.
(Greencloud Wanted to go fishing on, Fri 23 May 2008, 12:19, closed)

And it doesn't get any better
My two go out of their way to make each other laugh so much they wet themselves.


They're ten and a half.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 23 May 2008, 12:27, closed)

I'm with..
...greencloud, my 18 month old girl hasn't got any aim at all.

Still, have a click. That made me laugh out loud, although the girls in accounts are looking at me funny now.
( The Pollitt chooses to listen to Enya on, Fri 23 May 2008, 14:25, closed)

Ah, kids these days...
First post in a long while that's actually had me laughing like a loon.

*clicks*
(quantum raspberry quizzically quashing Quebecans, Tue 27 May 2008, 11:48, closed)