A tough one
As essentially every relationship that includes me automatically becomes deadly. But how and ever there was two teenage romances that spring to mind.

The first was a nice girl, moderately good looking and good company. Her coat however, was coated with wax and used to make me gag in disgust (in my mind) as we walked side by side. That coat spelled the end of our relationship.

The second was another nice looking girl who I invited to the cinema for a bit of tongue lolling. Happy with the result of the date we skidaddled to Burger kings for some after cine munchies. As I sat opposite her I smiled thinking not a bad bird to bag when I saw "them". As the chip made its way towards her open gob I saw the tiniest set of fingers ever attached to a palm. I actually went to puke in the toilet and ran off texting her apologies and thankfully, never seeing her again.
( dazbrilliantwhites has been meaning to change this..., Thu 21 Oct 2010, 17:15, 4 replies)

Hang on...
"Her coat however, was coated with wax and used to make me gag in disgust (in my mind) as we walked side by side. That coat spelled the end of our relationship."

This is precisely why you shouldn't have relationships with dogs.
( ousgg is not seeking approval, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 17:18, closed)

woof
( dazbrilliantwhites has been meaning to change this..., Thu 21 Oct 2010, 18:02, closed)

But the tiny fingers
would have made your cock look massive.
(salvadorevincent, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 17:25, closed)

They were of insufficient length to attain any sort of grip therefore I'll use the metaphor of rubbing two dry sticks together. FRICTION.
( dazbrilliantwhites has been meaning to change this..., Thu 21 Oct 2010, 18:02, closed)

Tiny Fingers.
Was she a regular at the Thalidomide Arms?
( Awk Industries is actually a helic- NO, STAY BACK SHARK!, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 19:05, closed)

The first one was a Tapir and the second one was a Tarsir?
(Benzyl, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:28, closed)