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This is a question Restaurants, Kitchens and Bars... Oh my!

Many years ago, I went out with a chef. Kitchens are merely vice dens with food. You couldn't move for people bonking and snorting coke in the store room. And the things they did with the food...

My personal vice was chocolate mousse - I remember it being very calming in all the chaos around me. I think they put things in it.

Tell us your stories of working in kitchens, bars and the rest of the nightmare that is the catering trade.

(, Fri 21 Jul 2006, 9:58)
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Legless....and the leftwing omelette
The reason you didn't get looted and pillaged was that the Hells Angles are a very unusual chapter of Earl Grey drinking, kitten rescuing, charitable bikers. Although they will kill a prospect for adding sugar or smuggling English Breakfast into the clubhouse.

Anywaaay, late 80's, largish hotel/restaurant outside Edinburgh. Malcolm Rifkind MP (oor Malkie) having a meal out, possibly asking in bewilderment why his constituents had told him to 'get tae fuck' after the introduction of the Poll Tax.

Malkie sends back his omelette (tight fucker) due to being cold/otherwise manky. The chef, not a fan of the Tory mob, and also a sweaty, greasy, skanky mess after a full kitchen shift,whips out his (allegedly) extremely crusty pink spatula, inserts into meal, has a good wipe round, re-heats, tidies up a bit and 'service!'.

My elected representative (not by me) scoffed the lot. I still can't watch him being interviewed to this day without a mental picture popping up. I may be traumatised for life by the question 'was it a cheese omelette??'

BTW omelettes are good for this as the egg solidifies around the pubes so they aren't so obvious.

(Don't try this where chilli, horseradish etc has been used in the dish as you'll end up in last week's qotw)
(, Fri 21 Jul 2006, 11:07, Reply)

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