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This is a question Restaurants, Kitchens and Bars... Oh my!

Many years ago, I went out with a chef. Kitchens are merely vice dens with food. You couldn't move for people bonking and snorting coke in the store room. And the things they did with the food...

My personal vice was chocolate mousse - I remember it being very calming in all the chaos around me. I think they put things in it.

Tell us your stories of working in kitchens, bars and the rest of the nightmare that is the catering trade.

(, Fri 21 Jul 2006, 9:58)
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When I was 14...
... I had a job in the washing up bit of the kitchen at the R*****ffe Hotel, Paignton. Anyhoo anyone who has been lucky enough to get a job in the dizzy heights of 'automated dishwashing maintenance' will know that this job entails loading crate after crate of dishes/cutlery into a huge dishwasher, burning your hands considerably, getting them covered in shit...then doing it again and again for 6 hours until you've spilt enough shit on your shoes to make a hush puppy cry.
And you have to talk to dickhead silver service waiters.

Luckily, through the tedium...i made a friend...though i forget his name. I was dutifuly informed however, that he was mentally unstable...and obsessed with jason donovan and kylie minogues wedding in neighbours. He would grunt things under his breath and never really talk to me except to call the head waiter a 'cunt'...i would laugh...if only to avoid death.

He then one day proceeded to (in the middle of a rediculously busy shift) literally scream the alphabet at every member of kitchen staff from the washing up section which was raised above the rest of the kitchen like a stage. He looked like a little mental sesame street hitler.
Thenlater on one of the old spanish waiters whispered in my ear that he wanted me to 'lick his dick'.

This was the day that i quit (while still in my two week 'trial' period) and vowed never to work with food ever again.
or mental people.
or spaniards.

apologies for length!
(, Fri 21 Jul 2006, 12:17, Reply)

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