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This is a question Restaurants, Kitchens and Bars... Oh my!

Many years ago, I went out with a chef. Kitchens are merely vice dens with food. You couldn't move for people bonking and snorting coke in the store room. And the things they did with the food...

My personal vice was chocolate mousse - I remember it being very calming in all the chaos around me. I think they put things in it.

Tell us your stories of working in kitchens, bars and the rest of the nightmare that is the catering trade.

(, Fri 21 Jul 2006, 9:58)
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so many stories
i spent a lot of years working in bars/restuarants/hotels and have seen countless disgusting things done to peoples food/drinks, encountered many forms of violence (especially in scotland), known all manner of penny pinching, met a wide variety of cunts/psychos/imbeciles/arseholes...

but the absolute pinnacle was, when working in a live-in hotel-restuarant in the derbyshire peaks - a total hole, half the staff were junkies, incestious and semi-retarded. the manager was like a frightened rabbit - the place was run by devious, thieving kitchen staff.

i remember one particularly mouthy slapper waitress, who was screwing the head chef (and a number of other people on the side) had an ability to make even the nicest customer be rude to her. she just attraced drama. you all know the type, i'm sure.

anyways, shed managed to get quite upset by a couple of customers one time, and went in flailing her limbs and screaming to her boyfriend in the kitchen. he proceeded to take a blow-torch (they type used for caramellising sugar on the top of creme brulees) and heat one side of the a plate til it was shimmering hot.

she then took the plate to the customer, leaving the hot edge slightly off the edge of the table so it would need pushing in, and commenting 'mind the plate its a little hot'

cue customer trying to push it onto the table - its an automatic reaction - and the thing being SO FUCKING HOT her fingers stuck to it. she screams, it takes the skin off her fingertips, the plate flicks off the table and smashes, the customer, poor woman, is in tears - her fingers bleeding at the ends - the manager is running over with a first aid kit, everyone in the restuarant staring. and the waitress is just standing their grinning like a smug fucking bond villian.

i quit shortly afterwards.
(, Mon 24 Jul 2006, 10:47, Reply)

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