I worked as a despatch rider in the 1980s.
My first job was with Addison Lee, who were at the time probably the top firm of couriers in London.

My first job was to take something from an office right next to Kings cross, to another office near Great Portland street. This was a distance of roughly a mile.

I picked it up and set off. 4 hours later I called them to tell them I couldn't find great portland street. A short discussion established I was in fact in Croydon, some 15 miles south of where I was supposed to be.

They called me back into the office, and when I arrived, about 3 hours later, gave me the number of a shitty little company in old street who weren't really bothered if their riders were shit.

Can't blame them really, can I?
(username failed moderation, Thu 29 May 2014, 14:36, 8 replies)

That's got a kind of brilliance to it.
Isn't Great Portland Street not only close, but more or less in a straight line?
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Thu 29 May 2014, 14:50, closed)

Yes.
It's like getting lost inside a Sainsburys.
(username failed moderation, Thu 29 May 2014, 14:58, closed)

i worked for Hornets in the early 90s.
they sacked me when i refused to go to Putney at 5pm on a Friday. i lived in Essex. cunts.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Thu 29 May 2014, 15:06, closed)

To be honest, I'd rather
be in Putney than Essex at any time.
(username failed moderation, Thu 29 May 2014, 15:41, closed)

Superb.
How did despatch riders ever manage before GPS? Makes you wonder why they're not required to take The Knowledge like cabbies.
( .Yeti., Thu 29 May 2014, 15:31, closed)

I found you eventually get a sort of inbuilt compass in your head.
As well as the fact you know a lot of streets, even when you don't, you know which way you're supposed to be going, so it was only ever a case of looking up the last 200m in the A-Z.

I'd have thought a despatch riders knowledge of London after a couple of years would be as good as a cabbies.
(username failed moderation, Thu 29 May 2014, 15:44, closed)

Hahaha
I was a despatch rider for about ten years and have never heard of someone being so shit
( Harpago ¯\(°_o)/¯, Thu 29 May 2014, 16:10, closed)

10 years?
Fucking hell. I thought I had spent way too long doing it and I only did 4.
(username failed moderation, Fri 30 May 2014, 10:30, closed)