Had a council-house next door to us for ages...
Family consisted of a single mother who we hardly ever saw, a daughter/au-pair (never was too sure) who played drum'n'bass max volume ALL DAY LONG, and since our house was ex-council the walls are so thin anything not screwed down would be rattling along in tune.
Add to this two kids, one about eight, and one about five, who would frequently climb over fences/walls/gates and destroy gardens (apart from them, my road's a perfect example of retired, middle-class suburbia), nick toys and pee on garden furniture.

Anyway, back to the story...about a year before they finally got kicked out (after the incident with their rottweiler and my mum...but that's another story) "Mom" gets a new boyfriend, one who actually spends time with the kids and is fairly civil to the rest of us (didnt last long).

Part of his scheme to civilize the 2 little brats is to give them their own bikes and teach them how to ride. Cue lots of near-misses and yelling at new road-borne menace in the cul-de-sac. Used to see these kids as far away as the local shops, happily pedalling away.

Cue the unforgettable sight of the 5 yr old cycling butt-naked back from god knows where, jumping off his bike and running indoors with both hands pressed firmly to his arse.

Guess the little sod found out about chafing.
(nancyboy Oooh that tickles, Wed 31 Aug 2005, 21:13, Reply)