Abstinence is clearly something that happens to other people
When I was in highschool I was in one of those extension classes that has all the bright sparks in it. We were all the kids who'd spent primary school bored out of our minds and getting into varying degrees of trouble because of it. We therefore had an oversupply of highly intelligent class clowns who were terribly competitive about it. Rarely a day went by without a decent one-liner. I, however, was never destined to be a comedian. I'm not funny and I know that, so I rarely tried. Which brings me to the actual story:

In about year 9 we're in science class apparently learning about reproduction and the teacher is using it as an excuse to tell us about prevention of pregnancy. She's telling us about the different options available and how they work and then adds the usual "But of course, the best and most effective technique is simply abstinence." I put my hand up and asked the question I felt was needed at the time "What does that mean?" and the entire class fell about laughing hysterically.
Finally! I had made a good call! I can be funny!

...sort of. The thing is, I was actually serious. I'd never heard the word before and truly wanted to know what it meant. Luckily I was smart enough to pretend I'd meant it as the joke everyone took it as.

But now I must live with the shame of knowing that the funniest thing I ever said at school was an accident.

And if anyone I went to school with reads b3ta they now know my secret shame. *hangs head*
(xanthine, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 4:03, 1 reply)

I did the same.
But I was always a troublemaker myself, so the teacher didn't believe for one minute that I didn't know what a pap smear was. I don't honestly know how everyone else did, but they sure laughed hard enough to have me sent to the principle's office.
(jessemoya, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 6:23, closed)