Oh S**t!
While still in primary school and on a miserable day, some friends and I snuck back into the school building during lunch to get out of the cold.

We decided to play a game of hide and seek to pass the time. I deciding to kill two birds with one stone ran off to the loo to hide and take a much needed dump, which given the level of discomfort was most needed.

Having got sat down I realised the lock didn't work and fearing I might be found too early leaned forward to hold the door shut....
Unfortunately being still quite small this had the unwanted side affect of me sliding forward off the seat just as the bomb bay doors opened and I shit straight on the floor.

This left me with two choices, clean it up off the floor but (due to the broken lock) risk being caught by a friend and labelled as the kid who plays with poo or do a runner.

I of course did the later which led to a rather awkward assembly all about the importance of proper toilet usage.
Rumours ran wild about who the phantom toilet poo'er was, however my secret remained just that.... until now.
(KETCHUP, Thu 8 Sep 2011, 22:07, 8 replies)

You can say 'shit' on here, you shit.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 8 Sep 2011, 22:57, closed)

Thanks. :)
(KETCHUP, Thu 8 Sep 2011, 23:35, closed)

shit no! you can't say shit here!
Poo is preferred
(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Fri 9 Sep 2011, 1:25, closed)

Thanks to sites like this one,
I never cease to be amazed at the number of children who can reach school age without learning to use a toilet.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 Sep 2011, 10:47, closed)

A friend is a primary school teacher and what she tells me of open days would have your flabber ghasted. Apparently the mums try to out special their offspring in a weird munchausen by proxy syndrome kind of way. This years was topped after the usual "my johnny will only take his medicine from me so I'll need to come in three times a day..." and the "Cynthia can't be around cats or she wets herself..." with the mother of a 4 year old proudly trumping all the other mums by stating she will need to come in at break times and dinner as she was still breast feeding her child.

O_o
( Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 9 Sep 2011, 15:22, closed)

Ick.
At my primary school, there were spare pants kept in the cupboard, seemingly for the benefit of one child, who would soil himself on a near daily basis.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 Sep 2011, 19:41, closed)

I could use the toilet perfectly well before starting school (still can if you're interested), I just happened to fall off it on this occasion.......
(KETCHUP, Fri 9 Sep 2011, 17:20, closed)

Pretty sure they screw the lock on the door
And then hit them with a hammer til they're broken anyway.
(Spackles Made sexual advances in your general direction on, Sat 10 Sep 2011, 6:12, closed)