a lethal combination
of the School Trip and a Music Tour.

For those of you who don't know, classical musicians might appear like well-mannered geeks on the stage, but give them a sniff of liquor and they become the most badly-behaved, arrogant and generally annoying twunts around. Ditto private-school kids (except most of them don't appear well-mannered even when sober).

So, as you would deduce, sending a load of private-school kids on a music tour round France and Spain leads to mayhem. Specially when the Head of Music is shagging one of the 6th-formers (female), another music teacher is trying to get *friendly* with some of the slightly younger kids (male), and everyone else is paralytic.

The night that stands out was when we were leaning over our room balcony (sleeps 4, had about 25 people in there that night) have a crafty faaag, and saw the afore-mentioned Head of Music sneaking back to the hotel with the afore-mentioned 6th-former (obviously been on some sort of midnight tryst in the back alleys of Barcelona, classy). They were keeping to the shadows, trying not to be seen. They failed. We lobbed half an overripe watermelon at them, which hit the wall over their heads. He screamed like a little girl, dropped the floor and yelled "it's a bomb! run!". Then he saw us. Not only did he bollock us severely, but said the following night, we could only stay in the bar for two hours, instead of all night. Bastard.

Didn't stop shagging the 6th-former though. And he knew that we knew. Even gave us a crafty wink when we saw them going into his room to "work on her soprano solo".
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Thu 7 Dec 2006, 11:23, Reply)