i don't give presents, usually.
when i was a bartender, i had a customer come in after shopping and ask if i minded if he wrapped some gifts at a table. he was a good guy, so i said sure. when he finished he had wrapping paper left over and i decided to put some cigarette butts and other junk inside some empty packs and wrap them, then leave them unattended. sure enough, some goof stole the 'gifts' and ran off. everyone sitting at my bar had a big laugh. the end? no!

next day, an occasional customer came in and told us that some jerk friend of his had given him a present that was 'just garbage and cig. butts!' of course the regulars and i burst out laughing -- not only had our joke gained another punchline, but when the crabby giftee told us who the jerk friend was, we found out the identity of the present thief.
( postbear has metal knees, Tue 19 Dec 2006, 4:26, Reply)