Never get behind a group of womens at a queue for the ATM during drinking hours
Man: Insert card, press numbers, receive service required, leave.

Womens: Talk, giggle, cajole, lengthily search for card in handbag only when you reach front of queue. Insert card. Discuss. Search for number written on bit of paper somewhere in handbag. Have a good laugh about it. Type in PIN. Plan which club you might be going to later. Read every available option. Giggle and pose for good looking man in queue who looks very serious for some reason. Press a button. Discuss available options at great length. Adjust hair in reflection in bank window. Spend a VERY long time waving your hand over the screen for no apparent reason saying 'What's that mean!?'. Press another button. Squeel. Eject card. Complain loudly at how stupid these machines are. Insert card. Repeat...

See also queues for train tickets when your train is due in 5 minutes.
( ..wil, Tue 5 Jan 2010, 0:14, 6 replies)

fucking outrageous
i really feel compelled to comment on this. this is not representative of women at an ATM at all. I'm all for a laugh but clearly any woman at an ATM would have already left her card in her handbag IN the taxi.

This is however reminiscent of a group of shrill women buying Lambrini and numerous chocolate items at the self service tills in Tesco's.

That is all.
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Tue 5 Jan 2010, 1:13, closed)

I will no longer take the piss out of anyone at self service tills
Don't get me wrong I hate them with a passion but I used one of them when I had a cold on new year's eve so I ended up in Boots during the 'oh my god the shops won't be open until 11AM tomorrow' panic buy and I got glared at by an entire queue and then sneered at by the till bloke. Almost all of my shopping went in ok but apparently I'd comitted a terrible sin.

My mistake: Not realising a pocket pack of tissues doesn't weigh enough to register when you put it in the bag. Apparently it happens every time but head office can't be bothered to update the database so it automatically flags you up as a potential shoplifter and calls over a member of staff without telling you what's happening. You can imagine how long that took on new year's eve.

In general Boots staff seem quite bright so I'm suprised they didn't think of just sticking a hand written sign next to the tissues that were just in front of the tills explaining the situation. They must sell a lot of those little packs at this time of year so it must be more economical than leaving it as it is.
( ElParrot, Tue 5 Jan 2010, 1:32, closed)

the joy of self service tills
is that anything this light (tissues) you just chuck in the bag at the same time as a heavier item ie: it is then free

more worth while with expensive things though - an £8.50 jar of tesco's black truffles on top of a scanned slab of 24 beers - invisible.

brilliant!
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Tue 5 Jan 2010, 1:39, closed)

If only it was the other way round
Maybe I should just do that next time. It'll certainly reduce the poor guy's stress levels.
( ElParrot, Tue 5 Jan 2010, 1:41, closed)

Near the big Sainsbury's in Camden
Me and the missus needed cash. As it happened, there were three girls in the queue for one cashpoint and three blokes in the queue for the other, so I joined the "blokes" queue and she got in behind the women. The two previous users of the cashpoints had just left - pretty much simultaneously - leaving me open to do a completely non-scientific study to decide once and for all who is faster at the cashpoint, girls or boys.

Boys won by one person - that is, me and the three guys ahead of me were all finished in the same time it took for the three girls ahead of the missus. So guys take on average three-quarters of the time it takes for a girl to use a cashpoint.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Tue 5 Jan 2010, 10:18, closed)

You didn't...
...get fashionably heroined to death while waiting?
(TheSnark oh, c'mon, like you didn't see me coming, Tue 5 Jan 2010, 12:31, closed)