The water of doom
Que first beautiful, warm day of the year
que fat spliff and a nice walk

The sky is blue and the birds are chirping and i have a slight pressure from my intestines, but think nothing of it

Half hour into the walk i decide to light up the spliff at a nice secluded bush down some alley
it is at this point that I realize the slight pressure i felt down below is the brewings of a full-scale battle that is about to be raged

By this point i am not a little high and a half-hours walk away from my room and this is when i feel the first drip

The first thing that came into my mind was "incontinence" and i thought of old people shiting themselves in diapers--not a good thought when the next one is of YOU doing so

Relaxed pace turns into frantic speed-walk as my asshole apparantly starts to lose the battle to hold the damn closed, much like a stoned superman would have

The dripping feeling continues much to my dismay but i see my dorms ahead, just a 5 minute walk away. I can already tell there is very little if any solid matter in my future, but likely there will be much toilet paper

Did i mention they dont like us smoking ganja and coming back to the dorms? Obviously not something at the fore-front of my mind at this point

As i burst through the door and start sprinting up the stairs i hear familiar voices at my landing, and sure enough the RAs who busted me the week before are sitting there waiting for god-knows what, but certainly ready to give my reeking-of-joint self a good talking to

i guess i scared them away with the splattering sounds from the bathroom because they certainly werent there when i got out 15 minutes later

the feeling of instantly losing 5 pounds of water plus the relief of not getting busted plus the fat spliff=best shit of my life
(Rum Blumpkin, Fri 28 Mar 2008, 17:44, 1 reply)

.
"Stoned superman" made me do the lolz!
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Fri 28 Mar 2008, 18:15, closed)