ShopliftingWhen I was young and impressionable and on holiday in France, I followed some friends into a sweet shop and we each stole something. I was so mortified by this, I returned them.
My lack of French hampered this somewhat - they had no idea why the small English boy wanted to add some chews to the open box, and saw it as an attempt by a nasty foreigner oik to contaminate their stock. Not my best day.
What have you lifted?
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chthonic, Thu 10 Jan 2008, 11:13)
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Working in AsdaWe used to hear the glorious announcement over the tannoy 'Service Call 100 to the foyer', which meant some theivin gypo was in the store and it was about to kick off. When this was heard, ten or so blokes would remove their ties and jackets and half-run down to reception, normally to find someone having a dust up with the security guards. Then ten of us would pile on him and do our best to hold the fucker down. This happened one hot day in the middle of summer and some bloke had tried to nick a bottle of whisky. Anyway, he ran at one of us as he tried to flee the store and six of us piled on him. He was seriously strong, but we managed to get him into the security room, which was about 5 feet square and hold him there till the filth turned up. So i was kneeling on the guys back, and the six of us were in a small room with no ventilation and it was fucking boiling in there. After a while, someone said whos farted? Then the stench hit my nose. The tea-leaf had shat his pants, and i was kneeling not 6 inches from his trousers. We had to stay like that for half a fucking hour with that stench before the filth turned up.
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DumbMonkey The penis mightier than the sword, Wed 16 Jan 2008, 10:44,
1 reply)
lolI like.
(, Wed 16 Jan 2008, 12:11, closed)
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