When I was 8 I remember my mum and dad having a bit of a barny,
Shortly after Dad dragged me into the car 'quick quick we'v got to go to sainsburys!' Confused I buckled up my belt and said 'whats the rush, what are you panicking about?' 'its your mother,' He said 'she might be pregnant...I'v got to get her a pregnancy test NOW. If shes pregnant I'm fucked, your fucked. No more nice Christmas presents because I'l be up to my eyeballs in cunting debt!' We then proceeded to Sainsburys, hurriedly he bought the test (at this age I still wasn't too educated on the birds and bees so for me this was all a bit bazaar) We sped home and I plonked down in-front of the TV to watch tom and jerry.
Ten minutes later My old man walked into the sitting room with his hands on his head with the biggest look of relief I think I'v ever seen 'Thank the fucking lord!' He threw himself on the sofa cracked open a beer and slouching into it he gave a huge sigh.
'ohfuckohfuckofuck'
That was the day I found out how babies were made.
(shezam slouching towards nirvana., Sat 12 May 2012, 23:03, 6 replies)

I thought...
you went to Sainsbury's and not a bazaar?
(IHaveTheRightToArmBears, Sun 13 May 2012, 6:34, closed)

Ba-dum ...
... tish!
( Ghoti Fingers, Sun 13 May 2012, 9:28, closed)

If only this story was about the previous pregnancy.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 13 May 2012, 9:48, closed)

I see Shambo's still doing the thread delete thing.
For those interested my response was - "It's a pity your mum didn't charge extra to blow in her. Then I wouldn't have had to have read this tiresome reply."
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sun 13 May 2012, 9:59, closed)

It might have been more instructive
if your Da had then dragged you in to the car to buy a rubber syringe, and bar of hard soap and a cheese grater.
(the other guy not the one that gave you coochie warts, Mon 14 May 2012, 4:45, closed)