Drunk Sister
My lovely Sister has a problem with drink. That little voice inside you that says "Stop now, or you are going to regret it"?

Absent. Missing. Not There.

So one morning I had just got back into bed after a pee, when I notice a figure at the foot of my bed, silhouetted against the light coming through the doorway.

My first thought was "fucking hell, its Yoko Ono!", then the apparition spoke "Hi Mike, can I sleep here?" Shit, its my Sister! "How did you get in?" "Well, I knocked, but softly because I didn't want to wake you" (gets my vote for pissed logic of the century) "so I noticed you left the patio door open, and slept on the couch"

Apparently, she had gone out with her Husband , to a Wedding reception ion the Restaurant at the bottom of my road, drank herself daft, refused to go home, and had to be thrown out of the pub at 2 in the morning.

She then took 4 hours to walk the 150 yards to my house, stopping to play on the swings in the park at the bottom of my road.

I gave her my spare bed, and took her home to her (saint? idiot?) husband later on.

ps the reason I thought of Yoko, when it was my Sister has really long, straight black hair. She is actually really pretty, honest!
(micmac is happy as a pig in shite, Wed 31 Dec 2008, 11:17, Reply)