A couple more...
Q: How do you make a cat go 'woof'?
A: Douse it in petrol and throw a match on it.

Q: How do you make a dog go 'meow'?
A: Pass it quickly over a circular saw.

Q: What's worse than waking up with a splitting headache?
A: Child abuse.

I did that last joke to my ex girlfriend before we got got together. Now dead-baby jokes went down a storm with this girl, so I thought it would be perfectly safe to pull that little cracker on her as well. Can you guess what's coming next, kids? That's right...

Turns out she was badly abused as a child. I swear my blood turned to liquid nitrogen as I desperately searched for a way to claw my way out of that gaping chasm, and I haven't told that joke since. Dead baby jokes are, however, still fair game...
( Shegetz Chris Kamara's comedy moustache, Fri 10 Sep 2004, 23:44, Reply)