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This is a question Bad Smells

"I once left the world's stinkiest guff in a lift before sending it down to a group of Germans, all bustling to be first in the doors upon its arrival," giggles Boarders. Tell us your stories involving farts, noxious gasses and unpleasant smells.

(, Fri 17 Jan 2014, 11:56)
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Cup of tea, babe?
I have been in a relationship with my partner for so long that cup-caking and dutch-ovening have become stale. Having thought of a new way to 'share' the smell of my flatulence with her I offered to make us a cup of tea, whereupon I took her favourite mug out of the cupboard and proceeded to unload the gaseous contents of my arse into it. I placed a hand over the top of the mug to secure the precious cargo inside. It was warm to the touch. I walked through to the living-room with her favourite mug in hand and a look of grave concern.

"Look at your mug"

I presented the mug to her face. She looked at it and after a few seconds took, what could only be described as, a very committed sniff and promptly gagged.

She wouldn't talk to me for ages afterwards, even after she stopped boking.

The strong aroma of sabotage still lingers in that mug to this very day.

tl;dr - I farted in a cup.
(, Wed 22 Jan 2014, 15:55, 5 replies)
Eggy cup?

(, Wed 22 Jan 2014, 15:59, closed)

Nah, not really. Just bad memories.
(, Wed 22 Jan 2014, 16:02, closed)
Cheers for that.
Made me laugh.
(, Wed 22 Jan 2014, 16:27, closed)
My old boss used to have a bath every morning.
He used a pint glass to rinse his hair.

He sometimes used put the pint glass upside down in the water and catch his fart gas with it - a very pure way of doing it, as it is isolated from any air that could dilute it.

He would then cover it with his hand, and creep into the bedroom and stick it under the nose of his sleeping girlfriend.

Which is nice.
(, Wed 22 Jan 2014, 17:48, closed)
tl;dr thick bloke attracts thicker bird

(, Wed 22 Jan 2014, 18:56, closed)

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