Warning: long, no funnies and definitely cathartic.
In October 2008, I met the man I was going to marry. I knew this from the moment I met him - I was head over heels, there was never going to be anyone else. I'd never loved anyone the way I loved him. It turned out I didn't know who he was at all, and that in fact, to me, he is the worst person on the planet. He broke my heart, completely.

This man's name is David Cameron (MODEDIT: name changed.)

He was everything I ever dreamed of - tall, dark, handsome, a little older than me, had a well paying job in IT and a car, loved maths, sci-fi, comedy, and cheesy rock music, had a fantastic sense of humour, bought me roses and champagne on our first date, charmed me, and my housemates, my friends, in fact everyone he met. That was to be my downfall.

"Do you mean everything you are?"

Time went on, he lived in Warminster, I live in Brighton, he moved to Brighton to be closer to me and to his job in London. He hit a few financial troubles and I used my hard-earned scholarship money to help him out. He wrote off his car, I drove him everywhere. He had fights with his mum and brother, I made him watch Rent to make him cry, then held him while he cried, then told him what he needed to hear. When he was down I picked him back up again.

"Did you know, that everything she ever does, is for you?"

Christmas approached, and at the chemistry christmas social he held me in his arms and told me he loved me. We went home to visit my parents just before christmas and everything went like a dream. I had never been happier. Then the New Year came, and for one reason or another, he was always working the weekend, taking Open University exams, visiting obscure friends. He would never call, had no signal, had no credit. He'd promise to see me and then be hours late or cancel completely, after leaving me hanging around for a few hours, of course.

"Are you pleased with the way things are?"

Then in March 2009 I turned 21. He did everything the doting boyfriend was supposed to do, bought me gold earrings, didn't laugh at me too much when I got absolutely hammered, came home with me to my parents again. That was when he told me how happy I made him and how much he wanted things to work out with me. Then I went to Spain for a week in April, and when I came back, he just disappeared. When he reappeared he told me he'd seen his ex across the street and realised he was still in love with her, and that was why he was leaving me.

"And so it goes, as the story of a broken heart comes true..."

Within a week we were sleeping together again (I know, rookie mistake on my part!) and acting like we were boyfriend and girlfriend again, telling each other we loved each other, staying the night. I finished my exams and went to Paris with a friend, he drove us back from the airport late at night. One night not long after this a "friend" of his tried to commit suicide and then got admitted to a long term psychiatric unit. Suddenly he seemed to have a lot more free time and a lot less excuses to go away at the weekend. Alarm bells should have rung then.

"Have you learned all the secrets yet?"

By July he hit really hard financial times and had to move back to Warminster for a while, by which time I was really at the end of the tether due to his behaviour. We mutually decided it was best the relationship end there, and I began seeing one of my friends. This was much to his constant annoyance and he was very deliberate in trying to stop us getting together. He even came to see me in Brighton on my friend's birthday, although it didn't go to his plan, as my friends wouldn't let me out of their sight and I wouldn't on a sofa with him. He even tried the getting drunk and texting me the drunken "I love you text". Luckily by this point I was wising up and didn't let it get to me.

"I will listen to your pain, if you listen to me"

Of course the blossoming relationship necessesitated a wonderful trip to the GUM clinic to check all was well (I'm anal - excuse the pun! - about these things). All was not well. Neither me nor David had chlamydia before sleeping together, and I certainly hadn't had unprotected sex with anyone other than him. Cheating bastard. His best friend confirmed this. I googled him. He'd posted on twitter about going to see "Melissa" for the weekend. Told everyone in May about his beautiful redhead girlfriend called "Melissa". I'm not called Melissa, and I'm blonde. He'd spent 6 months lying to me, every time he went away for the weekend it was to sleep with her. He'd had unprotected sex with her and as a result potentially damaged my fertility for life. Needless to say he could have done much worse, after all HIV is eventually a death sentence. So that was how much he cared about and loved me.

"Be near, just for the moment, never go home"

So the love of my life is a man I never knew. One day she'll find out exactly what he did, karma is a bitch like that. Still toying over the idea of telling her myself, but I think that'd just be me being spiteful and would hurt her more than him, and I'm not sinking to his level. Thank goodness I got rid of him when I did!

Soundtrack: Story by Maroon 5

I'm much much happier and settled with my new man, he's a lot different, and I'm falling in love with him much more slowly, but experience is telling me this is probably a good thing. So this story does have a happy ending. I think I'm also going to go with Jimmy Eat World's philosophy in 23:

"I won't always love what I'll never have, I won't always live in my regrets".

Many apologies for length, it was tiny and very disappointing.
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 22:18, 3 replies)

That was sad and beautiful. Are you the new Belle de Jour - without being a prostitute, obviously.
(ShockerMocker, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 22:57, closed)

Thanks :)
Maybe... Unfortunately I don't get much time to post properly what with being a student and all. Look out for me over the summer? :)
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 9:34, closed)

I have a hunch
that twitter.com/davidcameron is going to find himself with some new followers quite soon
(Guy Debord cette mauvaise réputation..., Thu 28 Jan 2010, 23:49, closed)

He is an idiot
Rule number 1 of infidelity: don't post it on the internet where people can find it so easily.
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 9:32, closed)

I guess he's fucking Melissa now?

( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 12:49, closed)

Pretty much.
But he can't keep it up so she's probably not having the best time. :p
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 15:00, closed)

Beautifully written...
...sorry the guy was such a douche!
(satanstolemyteddybear Mu hõljuk on angerjaid täis, Sat 30 Jan 2010, 18:19, closed)