Diarrhea :(
My first sports day at high school. I was about 12. I was spectating, as I was rubbish at all sports and not deemed worthy of the team.

Unfortunately, I was beset by two problems - 1. I had diarrhea, and 2. I didn't know my way to the toilets. It was a huge comprehensive school and I had only been there a few weeks. The sports field was miles away from the rest of the school and I had no idea about the 'geography' of the place.

When I finally found my way there, I was absolutely bursting - seeing stars, gritting my teeth etc etc. The only toilet I could find was marked "Staff". I hobbled in, trying to keep my guts from exploding all over the place. I failed. Orange skitters squirted out of me before I had time to get my knickers down. I tried to aim for the toilet bowl, but only succeeded in pebble-dashing the floor, the toilet seat, the wall...

In a fit of panic, I tried to clean myself up as much as possible, but didn't dare risk being caught, so sped out of the stinking hellhole I had created without cleaning the cubicle.

I will never forget the sickened look on the janitor's face when I guiltily crept passed the scene of the crime, after the sports day had finished. He was attempting to clean the filth and looked as though he had been put off his tea for a week.

Gossip was heated for weeks, as both teachers and pupils alike speculated as to which teacher had been so disgustingly 'caught short'...
(Pantyliner, Wed 5 Apr 2006, 18:16, Reply)