The Great Jerry Can Catapult!!!
as a keen surfer and stoner layabout, I like nothing better than packing up some of my meagre possessions, cruising down the A30 to Cornwall and camping for a few days, enjoying the sun, surf and spliffs.

It was on one such occasion, after a few cans of St. Ella (patron saint of wife beating) that my buddy Carl revealed to us his bungee net.

This is a net made of bungee (or shock) cord with big plastic hooks at intervals around the edge.

As a group of stoners invariably do, we immediately saw the possibilities of this, and in a trice we had jury-rigged a powerful catapult using said net, and a VW Transporter van.

We tried various projectiles, and eventually settled on a (pretty much) empty jerry can.

The original aim of this was to fire the can through some cunningly erected hula hoops (not the delicious potato based snack)

Unfortunately, as tends to happen the gunner (me) got a little carried away and started firing at the person setting up the hoops.

This is where the dare comes in.

We challenged Carl (it's always Carl) to stand approximately 20 paces in front of the catapult and take a shot, being branded a pussy if he were to move in any way.

He agreed, but only on the condition that we could in some way protect his head.

This led to the development (again by yours truly) of the folding-camping-table-cum-helmet. basically a structure made of diamond shape trusses that fit over the shoulders, with a tight strip of webbing running down in front of the face.

Suitably attired, Carl stepped up to the plate.

With all my might I heaved back on the jerry can and net, and let loose an almighty shot, which clouted him in the left shoulder.

At this point he may have let out a cry of pain, but my other compatriots and I were to busy giggling to notice.

Naturally, this progressed into each of us having a turn and every one of us taking a shot to the face.

Due to the table/helmet we all escaped with noses and teeth intact, but seeing a jerry can hurtling towards your face with naught but a strip of webbing standing betwixt you and it is an almost trouser-browning experience.

Apologies for length, but the range was pretty good...
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 1 Nov 2007, 16:19, Reply)