Terrible ParentingMy parents used to lock my brother, sister and I in the car while they went to the pub for a "quick one" after work. This quick one might last several hours, during which they would send bottles of Indian Tonic Water to us by way of refreshment.
On one particularly cold evening, bored stupid, we lit a small bonfire on the back seat of the car using the cigarette lighter and the contents of the glove box. We owe our lives to passing winos. (BTW: Please no more Maddie or Jesus gags, they've been done.)
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 16 Aug 2007, 9:47)
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My dad likes to try an embarrass meMy parents came up to Newcastle to visit my at university. We had dinner, and chatted about how things were at home. Near the end of the dinner, he started a lovely faux-serious speech.
"Friz.. we found something in one of your drawers back home..."
I was wondering what the fuck it could be. Drugs? Cash? Dead baby?
"Yes we found... a condom"
Nonchalent as anything, I replied "isn't that better than not finding a condom."
He paused. "Yes, I guess it is"
"Good. I thought for a second you found my STD Clinic Appointment card".
I'm glad after 20 years of trying to embarrass me with the littlest things, I managed to get my own back.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2007, 11:40, Reply)
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