Terrible ParentingMy parents used to lock my brother, sister and I in the car while they went to the pub for a "quick one" after work. This quick one might last several hours, during which they would send bottles of Indian Tonic Water to us by way of refreshment.
On one particularly cold evening, bored stupid, we lit a small bonfire on the back seat of the car using the cigarette lighter and the contents of the glove box. We owe our lives to passing winos. (BTW: Please no more Maddie or Jesus gags, they've been done.)
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 16 Aug 2007, 9:47)
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Lamest weapon everAs well as the usual arsenal of glasses of fruit juice, knives and coasters, my dad threw a kiwi fruit at my mum.
A kiwi fruit. One of the softest fruits around. It's even furry, for fuck's sake.
Now, if he'd thrown a flightless bird at my mother, or even a large man from New Zealand, THAT would have been entertaining. But a Kiwi fruit? come on...
EDIT: and he missed too. From about a metre away.
(, Mon 20 Aug 2007, 14:36, Reply)
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