Back in my student days,
I was a part-time waiter in a bar/café in Edinburgh. It was quite a nice place, but was unfortunately located right next to the local drop-in centre. Which meant that at least once a week you’d have undesirable types coming in to beg money, try and steal stuff, or generally be a nuisance, and as one of the few blokes who worked there I’d always be the one who’d have to deal with it. Not fun.

One happy afternoon, I was serving some of the outside tables when I heard a shout, in broad Scots, of “There he is! That’s the bastard that sent me down for 10 years!” I looked up, and there was a very strange, red-faced hobo, whom I’d never seen before in my life, bearing down on me with rage in his eyes. Crap. He grabbed me by the throat, and said, “Got ye, ya bastard!”, and seemed to be about to hit me. The situation wasn’t exactly helped by a fellow waiter saying, dead-pan, “Silencer, I think you’re the guy who put him away for 10 years.” Yeah, thanks for that.

Anyway, I managed to get away and went inside, and we called the police. They never came, and this insane guy went on a bit of a rampage up and down the street for the rest of the day, attacking passing cars, throwing stuff around etc. All a bit odd.

The next day the manager called me into the office and asked me to go and take some takings to the bank, which I’d never done before. I remember it was about 2500 quid, which, sadly, is still the most money I’ve ever held in my life. The bank was only 5 minutes away, but no sooner had I rounded the corner and was out of sight of the restaurant when I saw the same guy from the day before coming straight towards me. I couldn’t run (2 and a half grand, partly in change, is pretty heavy), so I steeled myself for a brave death defending the restaurant’s precious money, when… he walked straight past me. Didn’t so much as batter an eyelid in recognition, and I never saw him again.

I like to imagine that the police eventually caught up with him and locked him up for 10 years, making him not insane but just extremely prescient.
(silencer, Thu 22 Jun 2006, 23:04, Reply)